


Hello Sunshine

by lifeinabeautifullight



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-04-07 23:19:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 30,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19095064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifeinabeautifullight/pseuds/lifeinabeautifullight
Summary: As Maggie Sawyer prepares to leave National City, an accident (and a sacrifice) brings Alex Danvers back into her life. A S5 fix-it.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I thought of a S5 fix-it fic so I wrote that S5 fix-it fic. Updated weekly.

She’d lied that November.

She hadn’t stayed with a friend.

She hadn’t wanted to be a burden.

Instead she’d spent weeks bouncing between hotels before finally finding a place of her own, a gorgeous red brick apartment down by the waterfront.

Rent was pricey but the views were gorgeous, and the property was within walking distance of the precinct. She didn’t even hesitate, signing the lease that day and moving her stuff in by the end of the week.

She loved her apartment, apartment 5C, and she was going to miss it tremendously. In fact, it was the only thing about the city that she was going to miss.

_ Well, except... _

She sighs at the thought, the memory, the heartache that lingers after all this time. She’s not naive, she knows it’s always going to be there. Hell, she’d be concerned if she woke up one day and it wasn’t there. It’s just...she thought it’d get easier over time. Yet eighteen months later and it’s still a gaping wound, one that continues to ooze as little reminders twist the knife.

Maggie traces the letters over and over again with a finger, the memories of that morning flooding back and slowing down what had been an otherwise swift and productive evening of packing.

She still has keepsakes from their time together, things she couldn’t bare to part with. Alex had been a big part of her life; their time together the  _ best time _ of her life. Maybe it wasn’t healthy to keep them but she had, in a sealed box, out of sight even if they weren’t always out of mind. This shirt, however, had been tucked away at the back of a drawer.

_ Hello Sunshine _ .

The day she’d packed her bags had been blurred by tears and alcohol, you could forgive her for forgetting she’d even taken it.

The past eighteen months had been hard.

Actually, no.

_ Hard _ would be an understatement.

_ Fucking unbearable _ would be more apt.

And it’s not like she hasn’t tried to pick herself up, to date other women, to move on. However, moving on from someone so extraordinary? That wasn’t an easy task, but she was trying, she really was, because she knew Alex wouldn’t want her to be unhappy, much like she wouldn’t want Alex to be unhappy either. They both deserved full, real and happy lives...yet she was only growing more and more convinced that Alex was the only piece out there that fit, that  _ completed  _ her.

Next week’s move to Gotham presented a fresh start, the chance for things to change. She was excited for it because, she figures, they couldn’t get any worse, right?

Tomorrow was her last day working for the NCPD. She’d tried to keep her departure as lowkey as possible, not wanting a fuss to be made but she knew for a fact that Tanner was throwing a not-so-surprise surprise party so, she figured, she’d get a headstart of packing things up now before the inevitable hangover.

Then she found that goddamn shirt.

And she can’t help but wonder if, all these years later, it still smelled like her.

_ No. Don’t _ .

She curses herself for even putting that thought into her head. That wasn’t helping, nor would keeping the shirt help either.

Yet she can’t throw it away.

There was goodwill but the thought of it sitting on a rack, unwanted, broke her goddamn heart - she knew exactly what that felt like, and it wasn’t pleasant.

As she dithers over what to do with it, she clutched it tightly, hoping that it would, somehow, bring that extraordinary woman back into her life.

And, just like that, there’s a knock at the door.

Her heart leaps at the possibility of fate calling, as her brain momentarily forgets she’d ordered take-out some thirty minutes ago.

‘Delivery for Sawyer?’

Maggie blinks back to reality. ‘Yeah, uh,’ she reaches for the twenty dollar bill she’d left close to the door. ‘Keep the change,’ she says, making a hasty exchange before the guy could see her teary eyes.

*** *** ***

She’d walked through those doors for the first time at the age of 22.

Her father had always been a resounding influence on her lifelong desire to be a cop. As a little girl, Maggie had wanted to be just like him; as a young woman, she wanted to protect others from people like him, to help the scared, the voiceless, the vulnerable. At her aunt’s recommendation, she’d went to NCU first, to have something to fall back on should a police career not work out, before then enrolling in the academy.

Charles ‘Charlie’ James had been her Sergeant when she’d joined, and her mentor. He’d quickly became a close friend before also becoming her Captain. He knew her reasons for leaving and those reasons were why he wasn’t standing in her way.

‘We need a detective on scene at a property in Westpoint. Disturbance and possible robbery. Wanna take it? One last call out?’

Maggie nods. ‘On it.’ The chances of a quiet last day had been unlikely. And she liked things that way. Keeping busy had always been her way of keeping going.

She’d put in a lot of overtime that November.

*** *** ***

It’s a second floor apartment they’ve been called out to.

As ranking officer, Maggie takes the lead and knocks on the door, the door opening with the contact of her fist. She draws her weapon. ‘NCPD.’ She lets a few seconds pass before calling out again. ‘We got a call about a disturbance, is everybody okay?’ Again, no response. She gives the nod to enter.

Nothing seems out of the ordinary at first. A tidy shoe rack sits on one side of the narrow corridor; picture frames hang neatly; and coat hooks sit occupied - Maggie can’t help but notice a few smaller coats, one bright pink and another dotted with ladybirds.

_ A child lives here _ .

And that realization makes turning the corner and seeing it all that bit more devastating.

The broken ornaments.

The blood.

The bodies.

She goes over to check for pulses but that’s merely protocol, she knows they’re already dead. It doesn’t take a medical examiner to determine the cause of deaths. Two adults: one male, one female, a gunshot wound to each of their heads.

As she always does, she closes her eyes for a second. It doesn’t matter how many times she sees things like this, it never gets any eas--.

She spins on her heels as something clatters from a not too distant room.

_ Follow me _ , she mouths to the two uniforms and follows the source of the sound, entering what appears to be--.

_ Damn _ .

The kid’s room.

The likely cause of the clatter, a painted pink wooden chair, lays on its side in front of a sticker covered cupboard that’d hastily been barricaded. Maggie carefully moves a matching chair and table away before slowly reaching for the handle.

As expected, there’s a child cowering inside.

_ A possible orphan _ .

Maggie instantly lowers her Glock.

It’s days like these that she really fucking hates her job.

*** *** ***

Her name’s Kayla.

She’s shy and, understandably, shaken but she clings tightly to Maggie whilst seeming scared of everyone else.

Maggie wraps her up in her police windbreaker and makes sure to ensure that the girl’s eyes are shielded as she escorts her from the room to a police car before taking her back to the precinct.

It’s a difficult situation. On one hand, there’s the silver lining that, at just four years old, she’s too young to join the dots and work out what has happened to her parents. Yet, on the other, that also meant that some poor soul from Child Services would have to break it to the kid that her mommy and daddy, whom she’d kept asking for, were never coming back.

Maggie really, really fucking hated her job on these sort of days.

As they wait for Child Services, Maggie prints off some colouring sheets from the internet and, in lieu of crayons and colour pencils, improvises by grabbing the markers used for the whiteboards in the bullpen. They’re limited to just four colours - red, blue, green and black - but they make it work.

‘That looks awesome.’

Kayla smiles, proud of the red and blue kitten she’d worked so hard on.

‘What’s their name?’

The kid answers without hesitation. ‘ _ Supercat! _ ’

Maggie should’ve seen it coming. ‘Like Supergirl?’

‘Yeah!’

_ Of course _ . ‘Do you like her?’

‘Yeah! She’s so cool!’

Maggie has many a story that could easily shatter that perception. However, she opts to play along. ‘She is pretty cool, isn’t she?’ She hasn’t spoken to Kara since that fateful month, their paths not once crossing. She’s always wondered if that’d been mere coincidence. Not that she’d blame Kara for avoiding her...it’s an awkward situation. ‘She’s helped me catch some bad guys before.’

‘Did you fly with her?’

‘I did,’ Maggie nods. ‘Once.’

‘Was it fun?’

Again, she lies. ‘So much fun.’ In reality it’d been a blur but, ultimately, flying through the air at such speed with little to hold onto had always seemed a terrifying prospect - Alex being abducted had constituted one of the few sets of extenuating circumstances that saw it happen.

‘I wanna fly like Supergirl!’

Oh was Maggie glad Kara wasn’t here, her ego would be fit to burst.

‘Detective Sawyer?’

Maggie looks over to see a uniformed officer standing with a smartly dressed woman.

‘This is Maria Cortez from Child Services.’

She nods, turns back to Kayla. ‘Hey sweetheart. I have to get back to catching bad guys but this lady, Miss Maria, she’s going to look after you. Is that okay?’

The smile on Kayla’s face disappears. She looks terrified again.

Maggie thinks fast. ‘There’s nothing to worry about. She’s a friend and she’s going to take you for ice-cream. You like ice-cream, right?’

The kid says nothing.

Maggie’s heart is breaking all over again but she can’t let it show. She caps her marker and scoots over to Kayla. ‘What’s your favorite flavour of ice-cream? My favorite is chocolate.’

After a few seconds, Kayla answers. ‘Red.’

‘Red...so is that strawberry? Or raspberry?’

‘Strawberry.’

‘Miss Maria has strawberry ice-cream, don’t you? With lots and lots of sprinkles?’

Maria smiles. ‘We absolutely do.’

‘See? All the ice-cream  _ and _ sprinkles you want.’

Kayla still seems reluctant to go but she seems to know it’s inevitable. Maria talks to her softly for a few minutes, finally convincing her that it’s okay.

‘Do you want your jacket back?’ Maria asks, nodding at the windbreaker that Kayla is still wearing.

Maggie shakes her head. ‘No, she can have it.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘It’s my last day on the job, I won’t be needing it anymore.’ Even if it wasn’t, she still would’ve let the girl keep it. ‘See you around, Kayla.’

Kayla runs over to give Maggie one last hug and a parting gift - the  _ Supercat  _ drawing.

*** *** ***

End of the day.

End of an era.

McConnell places a bottle of Scotch in the half-full, somewhat cliche, white copy paper box that houses the contents of her desk. ‘Leaving present.’

‘‘Cause you’re wishing me well or ‘cause you’re glad I’m leaving?’

He shrugs as he perches himself on the edge of the empty desk. ‘That’s for you to figure out. Plus, I figured you might need it after today.’

‘Thanks.’

‘Man,’ he shakes his head. ‘It’s gonna be weird without you here. Can’t believe you’re really leaving us for the madhouse.’

Maggie rolls her eyes. ‘I’m not going to miss your insensitive ass one bit.’

‘Hey calling that place  _ a madhouse _ is a compliment. Gotham is hell.’

‘And your iffy cologne isn’t?’

He laughs. ‘In all seriousness, I am going to miss you, Sawyer. Seriously. The GCPD is gaining a good one. It’s never always just been luck; you’ve always been the better detective.’

Rivals for the past couple of years, they’d always been in constant competition to score the highest case closure rate. She’d waited a long time to hear him finally concede that. He was very much a jackass but she appreciated him putting that bitterness aside for once. ‘That means a lot. Thank you.’

‘And thank  _ you  _ for your sacrifice. ‘Cause we both know that none of the incompetent assholes around here are even going to come close to challenging me this year.’ He pats her shoulder as leaves. ‘ _ O’Hara’s _ at 6. First round on me.’

‘Wouldn’t miss it,’ she says, reaching for her ringing phone. ‘Sawyer?’

‘Ma’am, there is a young lady asking for you at reception.’

She should be clocking off any minute, she didn’t really have the time for unexpected drop-ins. ‘Who?’

‘Kara Danvers. She says it’s important.’

*** *** ***

Not seeing Kara since that month had been tough too.

In addition to losing her fiancee, she’d also lost a little sister, friends, a  _ family _ .

She’d went from having it all, to having absolutely nothing - even the alien bar, her safe haven, had become off limits because the possibility of running into Alex was too real and her heart was too fragile.

And now she was scared she was going to lose Alex all over again, and grieve once more.

_ Why else would Kara drop by unannounced? _

Nausea ripples through her as she takes the stairs, her feet heavy. It feels like that November with bad news almost certainly on the horizon. Just like back then, she wants to run, to opt for ignorance rather than heartbreak. But she can’t.  _ Nobody gets better by running away _ , a wise woman would always say.

The reception area is quiet and she spots Kara in the distance, the Kryptonian’s solemn demeanour doing little to allay those growing fears, only solidifying them.

She takes a deep breath as she approaches but it does little to steady her nerves or her voice. ‘H-Hey. You wanted to see me?’

Kara springs from the chair she was sat in but the burst of energy is likely just her DNA, for the expression on her face is one of pure exhaustion. ‘Yeah, it’s--.’

‘About Alex?’

Kara nods.

Maggie’s stomach drops further, worst fears persisting. ‘Is this a conversation best held in private?’

Another nod.

Another sinking feeling but she puts on a brave front as she gestures for Kara to follow.

They walk in silence to an empty interrogation room. Kara immediately sits down in one of the chairs and takes a few seconds to herself. ‘I, uh,’ she fiddles with her glasses. ‘I don’t know how to say this but--.’

‘Is she okay?’ Maggie cuts right to it, unable to wait any longer.

‘She is,’ Kara replies. ‘Physically, she’s fine.’

A little weight was lifted off Maggie’s chest but she couldn’t help but note the choice to be specific, and the worries were still heavy. That was just how it goes. For as long as she would live, no matter if they were together or not, she would always worry about Alex, always - there was no way to stop worrying because, as she’d painfully discovered, there was no way to stop loving Alex. ‘But?’

‘But she did get hurt,’ Kara continues. ‘Not badly. A few bruised ribs, a sprained wrist and a minor head injury, a few cuts and bruises too. She also, uh,’ Kara looks down at the steel table as she fidgeted. ‘She also lost consciousness and when she woke up, she...she couldn’t remember anything.’

‘Amnesia?’

‘Kinda, maybe, it might be a little more complicated than that, we don’t know yet. But, uh...but she does remember one thing.’ Now Kara meets Maggie’s eyes. ‘You.’


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the wonderful feedback on the first chapter. Really blown away by the support, it’s all very much appreciated!

_ ‘You.’ _

After all this time, she’s still on Alex’s mind.

The  _ only _ thing on Alex’s mind.

That’s, however, irrelevant, completely unimportant all things considered. Alex got hurt. ‘What happened?’

‘A raid went wrong,’ Kara explains. ‘We were in a warehouse and some sort of supersonic blast brought a shelving unit down on her. It...it--.’

‘It could have been a lot worse,’ Maggie finishes, gravely. Being a cop was dangerous enough but the DEO stuff was a whole other level. Each and every time Maggie had fought alongside them, she’d felt so goddamn vulnerable. Human skin and bone was no match when it came to extraterrestrial foes - Kevlar could only do so much. ‘How long was she out for?’

‘A little while,’ Kara says. ‘I took her back to the DEO and they checked her over, CT scan, all that stuff. No signs of any internal injuries, but she has a likely concussion and, when she woke...she didn’t know where she was, or what had happened and she didn’t--.’ Her voice catches. ‘She didn’t recognise me.’

Maggie has to avert her eyes; she doesn’t like seeing the Girl of Steel break like this.

‘She looked so scared, so helpless and she just...she just kept asking for you.’

And Maggie was about to break down herself, picturing Alex, the toughest person she knew, like that. ‘What did you tell her?’

‘That you were busy. It was all we really could tell her, the doctor told us to avoid agitating her. The first time she woke she got so stressed out that they had to sedate her in case she hurt herself.’

Maggie swallows, finding a giant lump in her throat. ‘What…’ It hurts her to have to ask these questions but she has to, even if she’s scared of the answers. ‘What does she think we are? Friends? Girlfriends?’ The next one is the hardest to say, a painful reminder of how close they came. ‘Fiancees?’

Kara shrugs. ‘She didn’t say. Just said your name.’

Nothing about this situation was ever going to be easy and uncertainty was only making this harder. ‘If she thinks we’re more than friends, I can’t go there and pretend that we are. That isn’t right.I refuse to do that.’

‘I know, and I would never ask you to. It’s just...she won’t talk to anyone, and she’s confused and she’s...she’s scared.’ Kara’s voice shakes. ‘I-I’ve never seen her like this.’

Nor has Maggie, and Maggie has seen her share of the lows too. ‘When did it happen?’

‘This morning. The wee hours.’

‘Shit.’

‘There’s also something else you should know.’

‘And what’s that?’

Kara seems reluctant to elaborate, taking a few seconds before coming out with it. ‘It, uh...it could all be my fault.’

‘Kara, no,’ Maggie’s voice is firm. ‘She knows the risks when she goes out into the field, you can’t blame yourself for--.’

‘No, no, no, it’s not that. Like I told you, it’s complicated.’ The Kryptonian takes a deep breath. ‘A few months ago, she was under scrutiny from the Vice President. He brought in someone to oversee things and that person, some Colonel, wanted to know Supergirl’s identity. Alex agreed to a mindwipe to protect me.’

Of course she did. That was the sort of selfless act that Alex Danvers did without a second of hesitation.

‘All of this could be your typical amnesia, could very well be temporary but J’onn thinks,  _ fears _ , there’s a strong possibility that the mindwipe could’ve made things...more permanent.’ Kara looks down, looks ashamed, guilty.

Maggie is there to reassure. ‘Don’t blame yourself for this. It’s Alex. She’s always going to do whatever it takes to protect you, that’s just who she is. She’d do anything for those she loves.’ Like sit through baseball games despite having no real interest in them. Or drive to the other side of the city just to pick up tiramisu from this one vegan bakery that made it so right, all because her girlfriend was having a tough day.

It was easy to love Alex.

Kara nods, as if trying to convince herself that was true before standing. ‘Anyways, I just thought you should know.’

‘Thank you.’

Kara turns to leave.

‘Do I still have access to the DEO?’

‘Your clearance level was never revoked.’

Maggie’s brow arches. ‘Oh, I thought it had to be renewed each year?’ She hadn’t stepped foot in the building since the break-up, the NCPD’s unofficial partnership ultimately coming to an end - despite the personal circumstances surrounding it all, she knew for a fact that her Captain was happy with that, as the DEO almost always claimed jurisdiction on cases.

‘The new director made some exceptions to that rule,’ Kara smiles before leaving, that one word hanging particularly heavy in the air.

_ You _ .

Alex wanted  _ her _ .

*** *** ***

_ At a crime scene. _

_ At a bar. _

_ At a Barenaked Ladies concert. _

She must’ve pictured this moment a thousand times, a thousand possibilities had played out in her head.

_ On a rainy day. _

_ On New Year’s Eve. _

_ On death’s door. _

Yet despite all the scenarios, she hadn’t pictured this -  _ this  _ being her nervously walking through the DEO to see her amnesic ex-fiancee who may or may not think they’re still together.

_ This _ was uncharted territory.

_ This  _ was the most nerve-wracking thing that Maggie has ever done.

_ This _ , however, was the right thing to do, she’d never forgive herself if she didn’t do it.

Awkward or not, Alex needs her - that still doesn’t stop her from sitting in her car for ages as she dug deep to try and find enough courage to actually enter the building.

After navigating the elevators and corridors, she gets to the medical wing and finds Kara hanging outside what is, presumably, Alex’s room, talking to, again presumably, Alex’s doctor.

The Kryptonian spots her coming. ‘You came.’

‘It’s Alex.’ No further explanation is required.

The man in the white coat extends a hand. ‘I’m Doctor Jacobs. I’m in charge of Director Danvers’ care.’

She shakes it. ‘Maggie Sawyer, Director Danvers’...friend.’ Things had ended amicably, it wasn’t a lie. ‘How’s she doing?’ She’s too scared to sneak a look through the observation window, still not quite ready to lay eyes on what used to be her forever.

‘Her body has suffered quite the beating, she has a likely concussion and is in a lot of pain but we’re managing that and she should make a full recovery.’

‘And her memory?’

Jacobs nods. ‘She’s having significant memory issues as I believe Miss Danvers has told you.’

‘She has, yes,’ Maggie affirms. ‘Do you have any advice on how to approach that? I don’t want to lie to her but I also don’t want to upset her.’

‘The best advice I can give you is to go with the flow,’ he replies. ‘Try to keep her calm. If she says something that is incorrect or muddled then, gently, guide her to the truth rather than jump straight to it.’

That Maggie figures. It doesn’t really help her with her situation though.

‘Any more questions then I’m more than happy to help.’

‘Actually, I do have one more,’ she says. ‘Is there a gentle way to remind someone that they broke off our engagement?’

His smile is kind, sympathetic. ‘Unfortunately some realities will always be tough to remember.’

_ Some realities were just tough, period. _

Kara places a hand on Maggie’s back. ‘Thank you, Doctor.’

‘Yeah, thank you,’ Maggie adds, her eyes drifting down to the linoleum floor as the patented sterile smell of the medical environment fills her nostrils. 

Kara’s voice stops her from slipping into the minefield that was currently her mind. ‘You don’t have to do this.’

‘I do.’

‘You broke up mutually, you don’t owe her anything.’

Now Maggie looks up. ‘Kara, I owe her  _ everything _ .’ The year they spent together was the best year of her life; she owed her for every second of that unadulterated happiness. ‘She needs me so I’m going to be there for her as long as she wants me.’

_ So...until Alex remembers what she wants again. _

Every word of that exchange is forever burned into her memory, as is the sound of desperation in her own voice as they came closer and closer to the inevitable.  _ I want you _ . And so is the cold brush off that finally shattered her heart.  _ Yeah, I know babe. But I want kids _ .

Maggie knew the harshness was unintentional, that Alex loved her with every fibre of her being but still...it hurt. Rejection almost always did, and this particular one cut the deepest. She’d almost had it all - the wife, the new family, the dog that might or might not have been called Gertrude - only for her to, once again, be left with absolutely nothing.

That was what hurt the most.

And the thought of having to relive it? To have to possibly tell Alex how close they came? That was what she was dreading the most.

She takes a deep breath, sucking it up

Alex greets her with a smile -  _ that smile _ , the one that was reserved for only one person. ‘Hey.’

Maggie smiles back, it’s hard not to. ‘Hey. Heard you got into a fight with some shelves.’

‘Yeah, you should see them. I fucked them up them real good...I think.’

The smile fades. ‘I’ll bet.’ She’d usually laugh at that sort of lame joke but she couldn’t when Alex was in a hospital bed with various sets of stitches on her face, an eye starting to blacken and a brace stabilizing one wrist.

There was also something else she couldn’t help but notice.

The haircut.

The new, gay, undercut.

Commenting on it, however, only risked causing unnecessary confusion so she doesn’t. She perches on the edge of the bed, attention drawn to the photos in Alex’s lap. ‘Are these helping at all?’

Alex sadly shakes her head. ‘These were in my office but I look at them and I feel...nothing.’ The frame in her hands is of the Danvers girls from a few Christmases ago, both wearing matching ugly sweaters. ‘She says she’s my sister but I don’t remember her at all. No memories, no faint feelings, just nothing. I didn’t even know her name.’

‘She  _ is _ your sister,’ Maggie says softly.

‘We look nothing alike.’

‘That doesn’t mean anything.’ Blood may be thicker but blood was also messier when spilt. ‘When you two are together, you’re two peas in a pod. There’s even a saying -  _ the Danvers Sisters, they should come with a warning _ .’

Alex frowns. ‘We’re that bad?’

‘Let’s just say that your neighbours have long tired of the  _ Frozen  _ singalongs.’

It’s a redundant reference. ‘I wish I knew what that meant.’

Maggie could sit and feel bad for bringing it up but, instead, decides to capitalize on it, using it as an opportunity to, gently,  _ guide  _ Alex to the truth. ‘It’s a movie, one that you and your sister absolutely love.’

It still means nothing. ‘Right,’ Alex pauses, her eyes narrowing. ‘Why are you sitting so far away? I got injured, I’m not contagious.’

Maggie shuffles a little closer.

Close enough for Alex to reach for her hand and take it.

As always, her hand in Alex’s feels like home, the perfect fit. Unsure of what exactly it means, she goes digging. ‘What’s the last thing you remember?’

Alex gives it some thought, pursing her lips as she tries to recollect before ultimately shaking her head. ‘I...I don’t know. It’s all so foggy, I...I can’t even remember getting this haircut which, hello, I think I should given that I’ve shaved part of my hair off.’

Maggie can’t stop herself from saying it. ‘It suits you.’

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah, it looks good.’  _ Gorgeous _ even, the bedhead making it even more so. ‘What about us? What’s the last thing you remember about us?’

Alex takes a few moments and, this time, she has an answer. ‘You made me breakfast.’

_ Together. She thinks they’re still together _ .

‘And you split your coffee, all over your newspaper,’ she laughs.

Much like Maggie had that morning, she doesn’t find it funny. ‘Alex--.’

‘I know, I know, it wasn’t that funny, but your reaction? Priceless.’

She tries again. ‘Alex--.’ It’s her phone that cuts her off this time. ‘Sorry,’ she mutters, reaching for it, about to turn it off until she sees who’s calling.

‘Important?’

It is, it’s Maria Cortez, the lady from Child Services that’d taken Kayla. ‘Do you mind if I take this?’

Alex shakes her head. ‘Not at all.’

Maggie nips out into the corridor to answer. ‘Sawyer.’

‘Hi Maggie, I’m calling about Kayla?’

‘Is she okay?’

‘She’s finding things incredibly difficult.’

Understandable. The poor kid had gone from having it all this morning to having absolutely nothing now. ‘I’m really sorry to hear that.’ And she was, because she could relate. Not once, but twice. ‘Have you managed to get in contact with any family members?’

‘She has an Uncle but he’s not interested.’

_ Damn _ . ‘Is there anything I can do to help?’

‘Well, she keeps asking about  _ Detective Maggie  _ so if you’re able to drop by at some point to help her settle then I’m sure that’d be appreciated.’

_ Detective Maggie _ . That warmed an otherwise aching heart. ‘I can do that. When would be best?’

‘Is tomorrow morning okay?’

‘That’d be great.’

‘Brilliant. She’ll be excited to see you.’

‘I’m excited to see her too. Thanks for calling.’

They exchange goodbyes before ending the call.

Maggie rejoins Alex. ‘Sorry about that.’

‘Is everything okay?’

‘We, uh, we were called out to an apartment this morning, reports of a disturbance,’ Maggie explains. ‘We found a kid, a little girl, hiding in a cupboard. Her parents had been murdered in the living room.’

Alex grimaces. ‘I’m so sorry. That’s awful.’

‘Yeah, it was.’ Some crimes could, and would, be forgotten over time. That would never be one of them. ‘That was Child Services giving me an update on Kayla, the girl. She has one immediate family member and they don’t want her, and she’s struggling.’

‘I can only imagine.’

And there it was, another difficult topic. Alex likely didn’t know about her father either.  _ Fuck _ .

‘Hey.’ Alex reached for Maggie’s arm. ‘I think I’m going to do what the Doctor keeps telling me, and get some rest.’

‘That’s a good idea.’

‘Will you stay?’

‘Of course,’ Maggie replies. ‘I’m going to see Kayla in the morning but other than that? I’ll be here for as long as you want me.’

Content, Alex’s eyes flutter shut. ‘I love you.’

It’s instinctual, her lips are moving before she can stop them. ‘I--.’ She’s stopped only, and once again, by her phone.

Alex chuckles. ‘You’re popular this evening.’

_ Or not _ , Maggie thinks as she sees the name flashing on the screen. ‘Be right back. Again,’ she says before heading back out. ‘Hey I’m sorry, I--.’

‘If you had no intention of coming, you should’ve just said so.’ McConnell is pissed. ‘There’s a lot of people here that came because they thought you were too. Who bails on their own leaving party?’

‘I didn’t bail, something came up, I--.’

‘Are you even going to bother showing up at all?’

Maggie looks through the window into the room and at the hurting, confused woman in the bed. Leaving her tomorrow to see Kayla made her bad enough. And besides, she’d promised to stay. ‘I can’t, I’m sorry.’

McConnell scoffs. ‘You could’ve at least let us know.’

It hadn’t even crossed her mind at all. ‘Again, I really am sorry.’ Actually, no, that’s a lie, a mere pleasantry. She wasn’t sorry that she’d gotten sidetracked because this? Alex? She was more important.

The detective huffs a goodbye and hangs up.

She sighs.

‘Everything good?’

Maggie turns to find Kara approaching. ‘My leaving party was tonight.’

‘You’re leaving?’

‘Supposed to be,’ Maggie replies. ‘Moving to Gotham next week.’ Though she wasn’t sure if that’d be happening now. There was no way she’d be on that flight Tuesday morning if Alex still needed her.

‘Gotham, that’s...far away.’

‘That was the plan. A fresh start.’

Kara forces a smile. ‘I’m sorry, this probably isn’t helping, is it?’

‘Not really, no...but you don’t need to keep apologising. Letting me know, and me being here, was the right thing to do.’ Except sometimes the right thing to do was the hardest thing, like having to listen to the love of your life tell you that they love you even though you aren't destined to be together. ‘I’m happy to be here. I want Alex to be okay.’

The Kryptonian looks over at her sister. ‘The doctor says she should be able to go home tomorrow.'

‘That’s good.’ Then it dawns on her. ‘I’ll have to look after her, won’t I?’

‘Not if you don’t want to. I would but, understandably, she’s not comfortable around me just yet. I’m a stranger to her.’

‘I do want to, I really do, it’s just…’ She sighs. ‘She still thinks we’re together.’

‘Oh.’

‘I was going to tell her but got interrupted,’ she says. ‘You heard what the Doctor said. It has to be gently, at the right time...she’s already hurting and she’s already lost a lot, it’s not fair to spring that out of nowhere.’  _ But, on the other hand…  _ ‘It’s also not fair to string her along.’ Maggie starts to pace, lashing out at a trash can with her foot. ‘What the fuck am I going to do?’ And another kick. ‘Why does shit like this keep happening to her?’

‘Her?’

‘She loses her father at a young age, gets him back and then loses him again. That nearly broke her. And now she has to go through the same thing but with me?’ The universe loves toying with Alex and putting her through hell. ‘It’s not fair on her.’

‘It’s not,’ Kara agrees. ‘But it’s not fair on you either.’

Maybe it wasn’t, Maggie was so used to this sort of shit that it never bothered her anymore. ‘I’ll look after her but I will have to tell her soon. There’s only so long before she realizes it’s a one-sided relationship, and I refuse to lead her on.’

‘I know, I know,’ Kara nods.

‘I, uh,’ Maggie gestures to the door. ‘I’m going to go sit with her.’

Kara stops her just before she enters. ‘When was the last time you ate?’

That was a good question. She gives it some thought. ‘Do two cookies for lunch count?’

‘As delicious as cookies are, they do not count as a proper meal on this planet.’

‘Do they count as a meal on  _ any _ planet?’

‘Probably not but if such a planet does exist then you best bet I want to move there,’ Kara quips. ‘I’ll get you something to eat.’

‘Thanks. I appreciate it.’

She rejoins her ex, not surprised to find her already asleep - Alex has always been a quick sleeper, something that Maggie would always find adorable, especially when Alex would lose the battle to slumber on the couch as they watched a movie.

She looks so peaceful, so beautiful, so innocent.

Maggie hates the thought that it may very well be her turn to have to say those words, to have to be the heartbreaker.

But that’s later.

Until then Maggie’s not leaving Alex’s side, and she’s holding Alex’s hand and she’s bringing Alex’s hand up to her lips and placing the gentlest of kisses on the knuckles. ‘You too,’ she whispers. ‘Forever.’

*** *** ***

First Alex.

Now Kayla.

It feels nice to be wanted, even if the circumstances are dire in both instances.

‘Maggie!’

Maggie’s nearly toppled by the force the little girl runs at her. ‘Hey!’

‘That’s more than anyone else has managed to get out of her since we brought her here,’ Maria sadly remarks.

Once again, they sit and colour, only this time they have more colours to choose from as they sit at a tiny kids table in tiny chairs that Maggie finds herself, oddly, comfortable in - she’s always been the butt of short jokes and, yes, she knows she’s small but she’s really  _ this _ small?

They chat about what the pictures they’re working on before having a debate over what the best colour is - Kayla says red, Maggie vehemently fights for pink.

Then the mood dramatically changes with just five words. ‘I miss mommy and daddy.’

Maggie thought this might come up, so she’s prepared. ‘I have a story to tell you about Supergirl.’

Kayla looks up from her picture.

‘Do you know where Supergirl is from?’

The girl shakes her head.

‘Well, she’s from this planet called Krypton but, when she was little, she had to leave and her mommy and daddy couldn’t come with her.’ She’d spare the kid the reason why. ‘So, when she came to Earth, she missed her mommy and daddy very much too. She still does.’ Maggie’s smile is kind, hopefully reassuring. ‘But then, after arriving on Earth, she quickly made some friends and those friends? Those friends helped her become Supergirl.’

‘Will you be my friend?’ Kayla asks.

‘I’m already your friend.’

‘Promise?’

‘I promise.’ She holds out a finger, and elevates that promise to pinkie level.

*** *** ***

She gets back to the DEO around midday.

Alex is waiting for her, eager to leave. ‘Can we go?’ She’s dressed in adorably oversized agency sweats, sitting cross-legged on the bed.

‘Have you been cleared?’

‘Yes.’

‘She has.’ Kara appears in the doorway. ‘The doctor did say though that she needs to take it easy for the next few days, with lots of rest.’

_ Take it easy. Rest _ . Two concepts that Alex has never fully grasped. Maggie would, however, make sure that she built up an understanding of them both. ‘I’ll take care of her, don’t worry.’ Her eyes flick back to Alex, as she wonders if she should break the news now, get it out of the way whilst spirits were high.

The decision ultimately gets made for her, an impatient Alex swinging her legs off the side of the bed, not wanting to wait another minute. ‘Let’s go then.’

Maybe it’s for the better. The apartment is a better place to have such a conversation as it’s private and where Alex is likely to feel most at ease.

And she does seem to remember it, her body language noticeably less tense here than back at the DEO.

Maggie remembers this place too. She remembers the first time she stepped foot inside, with pizza and beer; and she also remembers the last time she’d left, a holdall slung over one shoulder whilst her chest carried her shattered heart.

Little has changed in those eighteen months. It looks almost exactly the same, minus a few photographs on the mantelpiece, the cookbooks that were hers and a few other little decorations that she’d brought when she’d moved in.

Then she spots it, the little bonsai tree that’d been forgotten in the hasty move, sat on the kitchen worktop, alive and flourishing. Time and effort had been taken to look after it, to care for it, to nurture it, and the thought of Alex doting on this little plant makes Maggie smile, and she can’t help but remark on it. ‘That’s doing well.’

Yet its met with a blank stare. ‘Has that always been there?’

It had not, once residing on a shelf by Maggie’s side of the bed. It was a little detail, yes, as were the other missing features of the shared apartment but those little details would soon add up. She’d start wondering soon. ‘Alex, there’s something I need to talk to you about--.’

She doesn’t get to finish, as Alex wobbles.

Maggie catches her, steadies her. ‘Whoa, easy.’

‘The room is...spinning.’

‘It’s okay, I’ve got you,’ Maggie reassures. ‘Take deep breaths, relax, I’m here.’

It takes a few moments for the dizzy spell to pass. ‘I’m good.’

‘No, right now, you’re not.’ She guides Alex over to the bed that used to be theirs. ‘Rest.’

She expects protest but is met with surrender. ‘Okay, okay.’ Alex never goes down without a fight, she’s definitely struggling.

Maggie fluffs up the pillows before pulling the comforter up over Alex. ‘Comfy?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Good, I’ll let you get some sleep.’

Alex catches her arm just as she tries to leave. ‘What were you going to tell me?’

It wasn’t the right time. ‘It can wait a little longer.’

‘You sure?’

She is. ‘Yeah. Get some rest first, your health is the most important thing.’ She runs her thumb over the back of Alex’s hand. ‘So, you sleep, and I’ll work on making you something to eat later. How does that sound?’

‘That sounds great.’

She could do with some rest herself, only getting a few hours in that bedside armchair. Instead she opts for coffee and splashing cold water on her face before staring back at the woman in the mirror.

The woman’s tired.  _ You need sleep. _

Critical.  _ What happened to that fresh start? _

And scared.  _ You’re just going to get hurt again _ .

*** *** ***

She takes stock as Alex sleeps.

Quite literally.

She looks through the cupboards and fridge, finding them horrifyingly vacant, a sign that Alex had reverted back to her old ways of daily take-outs - together, they’d limited it to just two nights a week (Mondays and Fridays) with a date night at the weekend and home cooked meals the rest.

It had been perfect.

The domesticity of it all had been wonderful. From doing the dishes together (they’d decided against a dishwasher, deeming it more hassle than it was worth) to having their own set individual chores to, simply, spending evenings in together in lieu of going out, Maggie had loved every second.

Now it felt weird to be slaving over the stove at an apartment that used to be home.

_ Sigh _ .

She ladles the soup into a bowl and brings it over to the couch. ‘For you.’

Alex stares at it. ‘What is it?’

‘Potato and spring onion.’

Alex pulls a face.

Maggie can’t help but chuckle. ‘You know, you had that exact same reaction when I first made it for you too.’

‘Do I like it?’

‘You  _ love  _ it.’ In fact, Maggie had been taken aback by how much Alex had lapped it up. ‘Would I have made it if you didn’t? Go on, try it.’

A hesitant Alex takes a spoonful then moans softly. ‘Oh.’

‘Good?’

She nods. ‘ _ So  _ good.’

‘Told you.’

Alex takes another spoonful with exactly the same result. ‘You’re a good cook.’

‘Thank you.’

‘No, I mean, I remember that,’ Alex says. ‘You cook for me all the time.’

‘Not to be rude but there were reasons for that.’

‘I know, I know, I’m a terrible cook that’s something I do know.’

‘Not terrible.’ That wasn’t a fair assessment.  _ Terrible _ would suggest inedible. ‘You’re just a little slow and tend to do things a little...well, cripsy.’

‘Still,’ Alex waves her off. ‘It’s not right, and I’d feel guilty when you’d spend your evenings cooking for me.’

Maggie had never minded one bit. Cooking has always been a passion, and there was just something wonderful about cooking for the woman that you loved. Plus, Alex was always grateful and made her feel appreciated. ‘You’ve never told me that.’

‘Well, I’m telling you now, especially since it’s one of the few things I do remember.’ She cools her soup down with a gentle blow. ‘And its something that I can, and will, change. I-I’ll go to cooking classes. I’ll learn to cook.’

‘You don’t need to--.’

‘But I  _ want to _ ,’ Alex interjects. ‘For you. For  _ us _ .’

_ Us _ . The thing that was now merely a concept, a concept that Maggie doesn’t quite know how to explain, a concept that she has to explain before it’s too late. And she considers going for it but is, once again, stopped from doing so by someone knocking at the door - she’d place good money on it beng Kara. ‘Want me to get that?’

Mouth full, Alex manages to mumble a  _ yes _ .

Maggie hops to it, so certain on the caller that she doesn’t bother to look through the peephole.

She’s wrong though. It isn’t Kara. It’s a woman that she’s never seen before but, for some reason, there’s something about her that’s faintly familiar.

‘Hi? Can I help you?’

The woman smiles but it’s very evidently forced. ‘Is Alex in?’ There’s a suitcase to her left too, not your average cold caller.

‘She is, yeah. Can I ask who you are?’

No handshake or any sort of formalities. Just the cold hard truth. ‘I’m Kelly. Alex’s girlfriend.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah, i love a cliffhanger :)
> 
> thoughts?


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you, again, for all the love for this! really appreciate it! :)

Of course.

Of course she has a girlfriend.

Who wouldn’t want to date Alex Danvers?

And it’s not the fact that she, Kelly, exists that angers Maggie - Alex deserves to be happy, to live a full, real and happy life - it’s the fact that she exists and nobody’s told her. A heads-up, a warning, that would’ve been nice but no...no, she’d hadn’t been allowed that courtesy and could only stand there, trying to process the news as Kelly walks past her.

‘I got the first flight I could when they told me.’

Maggie blinks back to reality. ‘Who told you?’

‘Kara.’

It feels like a kick to the gut when she’s already down, struggling, barely surviving.‘That’s funny,’ she mutters, ‘because she didn’t tell me.’

Kelly pauses, turning her attention back to Maggie. ‘Forgive me for asking but who are you?’

Maggie stutters because she knows that Kelly will know when she says it. ‘M-Maggie. Maggie Sawyer.’

The look on her face confirms it, her tone swiftly veering into an accusatory territory. ‘And why exactly are you here?’

It’s the oblivious Alex who makes the save. ‘Because I want her to be.’ She shakes her head, her eyes narrowing. ‘I’m sorry but who are _you_?’

‘Al, baby.’

 _Al_ ? Maggie’s never known Alex to go by that nickname. In fact, Alex all but hates nicknames - pet names were fine, she’d loved them, but, as she’d always offer as way of explanation, _Alex was already a nickname_.

Kelly crouches in front of Alex. ‘I’m Kelly. Your girlfriend.’

 _It really does suck to hear those words out loud_.

Alex frowns. ‘No...no, you’re not. Maggie’s my girlfriend.’

 _Oh boy_.

At least this time the accusation is direct. ‘What lies have you been telling her?’

‘None,’ Maggie stands her ground. ‘I haven’t lied to her. I’ve barely had the chance to even have a proper conversation with her and, believe me, I’ve been trying to have that conversation.’

‘Believe you?’ Kelly scoffs. ‘Don’t think I don’t know who you are.’

‘My reputation precedes me.’ She knows she shouldn’t have, that it was only going to escalate the tension but it was instinctual. Being a smartass was always her go-to when arguments were brewing. ‘Listen. You don’t know me. You’re jumping to conclusions.’

‘Oh am I?’ She arches a brow. ‘Because I come here to see _my_ girlfriend who apparently has amnesia and the only person here, tending to her, is her ex-fiancee?’

Alex stands. ‘What? Maggie’s my girlfriend.’

‘No, baby, _I_ am,’ Kelly says.

‘No, you’re not--.’ Predictably it’s getting too much, and Alex struggles with her balance.

Kelly moves to steady her but Alex pushes her away.

Maggie swoops in before Alex hurts herself. ‘Easy, easy.’ She helps Alex sit back down.

It doesn’t stop Alex. ‘I don’t know who you are. Maggie’s my girlfriend, I love her.’

If the earlier words were a kick to the gut then these ones were a dagger straight through Maggie’s heart. She can’t put it off any longer but, god, she wishes the circumstances were better. ‘Sweetheart,’ the soft word slips out, probably not helping her case right now. ‘We aren’t together, not anymore. We broke up.’ It feels so cruel, she can’t even begin to imagine how Alex must’ve felt when she’d said those words - _we can’t be together_.

Alex looks so confused. ‘No,’ she shakes her head. ‘No, that can’t be right, that doesn’t make any sense. I-I’d never break up with you, and you...you wouldn’t either, we were happy, and I know you’d never cheat or do anything like that, you love me. And I love you.’

Maggie did, and she knew Alex did too. They were so in love...yet sometimes love wasn’t enough. ‘It was mutual,’ Maggie gently explains before turning around. ‘Can you give us a moment?’

‘Oh, I’m not going anywhere.’ Kelly crosses her arms. ‘It’s _you_ that should be leaving. You’re not in her life anymore, you’re confusing her.’

‘Alex asked for me to be here.’

‘And she is asking for you to leave,’ Alex speaks up.

Maggie looks back at her, her heart sinking until she realizes it was aimed at Kelly.

‘Alex--.’ Kelly tries but is cut off.

‘Please. Just leave. I need to talk to Maggie. We...we can talk later.’

There’s nothing Kelly can do but sigh. ‘Fine, okay.’ She reaches out to try to touch Alex’s hand but the hand is pulled away.

Maggie decides to show her to the door, wanting a quick chat in the somewhat more private corridor. ‘I wouldn’t take it personally. She doesn’t remember who her sister is right now.’

It does little to satisfy. ‘And yet she remembers _you_?’

‘I can’t choose what she remembers.’ Though she does wonder if there’s something more to it than just mere coincidence, a tiny little part of her brain dumbly thinking that maybe it was fate after all.

 _Stop it_ , she chides herself. _She has a fucking girlfriend now, and this isn’t the right time._

‘Look, she got hurt and she kept asking for me. What was I supposed to do? Not come?’ She wouldn’t have been able to live with herself if she’d left Alex all alone in a world full of blank faces.

‘You could’ve been honest with her,’ Kelly counters. ‘But, no. You come here and you act like nothing’s changed.’

‘I was waiting for the right time, I was gonna tell her.’

‘Were you?’ Kelly frowns. ‘Or were you going to live in your little fantasy world in which you’re back with her?’ She shakes her head and leaves.

Maggie wishes she could do the same. Leave, and run far away from this...but she can’t. She has to re-enter the apartment and deal with the consequences because it’s the right thing to do, because Alex still needs her.

To her surprise, Alex walks up and wraps her arms around her tightly.

Maggie’s hands hover, unsure if she’s allowed.

Then she feels tears starting to dampen her shirt, so she holds Alex tightly back in return. ‘I’m sorry,’ she whispers. And she was, truly. Telling her the truth was always going to hurt, she should’ve just ripped that band-aid off right away.

Alex’s voice is muffled by the plaid. ‘You...you were trying to protect me...you always do that.’

She always tried to, as best as she could. With the coming out, with the truth about Emily...she’d never wanted Alex to feel scared, or to worry.

Alex pulls away, wiping at her eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie.

Maggie gestures over to the couch. It was time for That Conversation.

It’s Alex that starts things off. ‘Why? We were so happy....I don’t understand.’

Every day together had felt like a dream. ‘We _were_ happy. And we were also engaged, planning our wedding...then, one day, we reached an impasse. You wanted children, I didn’t. That was it.’

Alex’s eyes narrow. ‘Children?’

‘Yes.’

And then her brow twists into a frown. ‘No, I...no, that doesn’t make sense.’

‘That’s what happened. We’d been together for almost a year but, for some reason, hadn’t ever discussed having kids.’ They’d been in love. Things had moved so quickly, so wonderfully, they’d never taken a minute to talk about something so simple, and so important.

Yet Alex remains insistent. ‘No, that can’t be it...I’d like kids, sure, but I could live without them.’

‘You-re..’

‘No, just no.’ Alex’s voice is firm. ‘I might be confused about a lot of things but I know this.’

Maggie, however, knew different. ‘Kara told me you applied to adopt.’ She’d told Maggie that this morning, whilst completely neglecting to tell her about Kelly.

‘What?’

Maggie nods. ‘The papers all filled out and approved.’ And that was something that couldn’t be done overnight. The adoption process was long, a lot of paperwork and a lot of checks. It wasn’t something that was done on a whim. ‘It’s now just a matter of matching you with the right child.’

‘This can’t be right,’ Alex ran fingers through her hair, starting to get worked up. ‘No, no, that’s...no, I--.’

‘Hey,’ Maggie says gently. ‘It’s okay, it’s--.’

‘It’s not _okay_ , alright? Because it isn’t right. I’d never choose kids over you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.’

The words hit Maggie hard.

‘I love you, more than anything in the world. It’s you, it’s always been you.’

And harder and harder, and she can’t fight the tears that are now stinging her eyes. ‘Some things...they just aren’t meant to be.’

Alex’s bottom lip trembles and her voice is small, barely audible. ‘What about me and Kelly?’

‘I don’t know about that,’ Maggie says. It’s all she can say. ‘Only you know that.’

Alex falls silent, her eyes drifting down and she sits there, still and not saying anything before eventually reaching for the bowl of soup that’s gone cold.

‘I can reheat that for you, if you want?’

Alex hands the bowl over in silence.

The rest of the day ends up being like that. Silence.

They watch movies in an attempt to piece together a fractured memory but it’s to no avail and Alex eventually calls it a night, early in the evening.

The second she’s out for the count, Maggie sends a text.

_Come over. Now._

The Girl of Steel is there within the minute. ‘What’s wrong?’

Maggie makes sure that the door’s shut, not wanting to wake Alex and put her through another round of this. ‘Why didn’t you tell me about Kelly?’ She’s not dancing around things anymore, doing so earlier had only made things worse.

It’s one of the few times she’s ever seen Kara struggle for words. ‘I-I--.’

‘And don’t even think about trying to bullshit me. It’s not some secret relationship, you fucking called her.’ She’s not going to be polite either. ‘Do you know how bad that looked? Me looking after my ex, who barely even knows her own fucking name? Why? Why didn’t you say anything?’

More stutters. ‘I, uh, I--.’

‘No, you don’t get to do that,’ Maggie shakes her head. ‘You did it for a reason, you did it because you thought I wouldn’t come if I knew about Kelly, didn’t you?’

Then came the smallest of nods. ‘Yeah.’

Maggie sighs. ‘I thought you knew me better than that, Kara. Hell, I thought we were friends but you’ve ignored me ever since Alex dumped me.’

And now Kara looks really guilty.

‘I had run-ins with Supergirl before I met Alex, plenty times. And then, all of sudden, I never see you again? The city was still a crime-filled shithole, the only thing that had changed was my relationship status.’ She’s getting sidetracked now so she returns to the original matter at hand. ‘Alex having Kelly sucks, yeah, but you really thought I wouldn’t care about her anymore because she has a girlfriend?’ She has to laugh; if only it was that easy to stop loving someone then all her heartache would be gone, just like that. ‘It doesn’t matter if she’s dating someone or, hell, is even married. If she needs me? I’ll always be there for her.’

 _Always_.

‘A heads-up would’ve been nice before she came to accuse me of taking advantage of her. Though honestly? I don’t blame her, I know how bad that looked.’

Kara looks at the ground. ‘I didn’t think...it’s just...it’s been tough.’

‘Yeah, well, it’s tough on all of us but we gotta do our best, work together,’ Maggie says. ‘I had to tell her the truth by the way.’

‘How did she take it?’

‘As well as you could expect.’ Maggie can’t help but ask, it’s been lingering on her mind ever since. ‘Has she really been approved for adoption?’

‘Approved? She was on the verge of getting a child, a newborn, but the mother decided to keep the baby.’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah. She went all the way to Portsmouth to wait for the baby to be born but, at the last minute, the mom, a seventeen year old, changed her mind. Alex was crushed.’ Her eyes narrow. ‘Why?’

‘It’s just she, uh, she said she wasn’t that bothered about kids. And I know, she’s probably confused but it’s the way she said it. She seemed so sure.’ And Maggie knew Alex - Alex was stubborn, it was hard to change her mind on little things, let alone something huge as having kids.

‘Huh.’ Kara adjusts her glasses. ‘I will say I was surprised when she told me she’d applied. It happened so quickly, as if she was in a rush.’

‘When did she apply?’

‘A few months after the break-up,’ Kara replies. ‘And, I know this sounds awful because she was upset about it, but I’m kinda glad she didn’t get the baby. She wasn’t ready for it. I mean that apartment alone isn’t right for starting a family, and she hasn’t said anything about finding a new place either.’

That apartment didn’t feel right for two adults, never mind a family. ‘Thanks for telling me that,’ Maggie says. ‘But I’m still pissed at you about this whole Kelly thing.’

Kara nods. ‘I know, I’m sorry.’

‘So, whilst you’re here, is there anything else I should know?’

The Kryptonian gives it some thought. ‘You know about Winn, right?’

‘I do.’ They’d kept in touch, and she missed him tremendously. ‘All that technology on that ship and email is the only way I can keep in touch with him,’ she laughs. ‘Is that it? Nothing else?’

‘I think that’s it but I’ll let you know if I think of anything.’

‘Alright, good.’ She’s about to go back inside, stopped only by a _Columbo_ moment. ‘Actually one more thing...can I have Kelly’s number? We got off on the wrong foot, I need to fix that.’

‘I’ll text you it.’

‘Thanks.

The second the door’s locked, Maggie leans against it and lets out a sigh. _Was this ever going to get any easier?_

*** *** ***

She stays the night.

It’s only the second time (bar the times she’d fallen asleep whilst watching TV) that she’s ever spent the night on the couch - the only other time had been when Alex was drunk and way too handsy, and a sober Maggie thought it’d be best to spend the night apart, not wishing for things to escalate when her then-girlfriend was such a state. Other than that, they’d slept together every night, no matter what.

They’d been more of a bickering couple but, on those rare occasions that they had fought, they’d still slept in the same bed, their bodies always finding their way to each other, even when they’d hurtled towards the inevitable.

Maggie’s memories of those last few days were, and would always be, painfully perfect.

Alex had come home one night acting strange. It took a while, and alcohol, to get those words out of her.

_‘I lied...I...I do want kids.’_

Maggie knew then that was it, that it wasn’t right to try and change Alex’s mind simply because she herself wasn’t totally sold on the idea of motherhood. Kids, or _a kid_ , were a big responsibility, a big challenge and a big change...she couldn’t guarantee she wanted that so it was only fair that they parted, to give Alex the opportunity to live the full, real and happy life that she wanted, that she deserved.

That, however, had been then.

Now? Now Maggie would be lying if she said that she couldn’t picture herself hurrying home after work to squeeze in a little colouring before reading a bedtime story.

Much like she wasn’t fully sold on motherhood, she’d never been fully against it either. The few hours she’d spent with Kayla, despite the awful circumstances, had been great. At the right time, with the right woman, she could see herself being a mom - but things had to be right and Alex...well, Alex couldn’t be that woman.

Alex had moved on.

Alex had a girlfriend.

 _Speaking of which_.

She reaches for her phone.

_Hey. It’s Maggie. I think we should talk._

It’s late, almost midnight, so she’s not sure if a reply would be forthcoming, especially after what had happened mere hours ago. Much to her surprise, however, Kelly replies almost instantly.

_I agree._

That’s something.

_Can you do tomorrow afternoon?_

The dots pop up immediately.

 _Yes_.

 Maggie gives it a little thought.

_How about the coffee shop on the corner of Alex’s street at 2? Does that work?_

It does.

_Yes. See you then._

And it was sorted. A coffee date with the new girlfriend.

_A coffee date with the luckiest woman alive._

*** *** ***

She wakes up to _Barenaked Ladies_.

The band, of course.

 _One Week_ is faintly playing.

Maggie sits up, spots Alex hovering in the kitchen. ‘You were meant to be taking it easy,’ she says sleepily but softly, not wishing to chide her, especially after yesterday’s events.

Alex, however, seems in better spirits. ‘I’m making you breakfast. To say thank you. This...this must be awkward for you but you’re here and that...that means a lot.’

Maggie smiles. ‘Still...please be careful that you don’t overdo things, okay?’

‘I won’t.’ Alex brings over a mug, setting it beside a plate that’s already sitting there on the coffee table. ‘One black coffee and one double toasted bagel. Gross.’

Just like always. ‘You remembered.’

‘It’ll take more than a knock to the head to forget how disgusting that is.’ The song changes. Her brow furrows as she listens to it. ‘Who sings this?’

‘Taylor Swift.’

‘Ah, okay, makes sense. You love her.’

‘You like her too,’ Maggie says, though Alex did prefer the older country-era than Miss Swift’s recent poppier discography.

‘Yeah but I’m listening to _your_ _Spotify_ , I couldn’t remember the password to mine,’ she admits. ‘If...that’s okay?’

Maggie laughs. ‘Of course that’s okay. And thank you, by the way.’ She reaches for her bagel which, in true Alex fashion, is closer to triple toasted than double. ‘Are you feeling any better this morning?’

‘My head still hurts a little, my ribs too but, yeah, better than yesterday.’ She relaxes back into the couch.

Maggie takes a sip of coffee. ‘Would you be okay if I leave you for an hour or so later today? I was thinking that Kara could come and keep you company, to try and help you work through some of that fogginess.’

‘It can’t hurt,’ Alex agrees. ‘Where are you going?’

‘I have to meet with someone, talk things--.’

Alex susses her out. ‘Kelly?’

‘Yeah,’ Maggie nods. ‘I need to have a proper talk with her. Yesterday didn’t go so well, and I thought it’d be best if I talked to her alone. But hey, if you don’t agree with that, just say - I don’t wanna intrude or impose or whatever...this is just what I think I should do.’

‘No, no, I trust you. It sounds like a good idea.’

It sounded like one but Maggie still wasn’t sure if it was. On paper, yeah, absolutely. Trying to properly explain that bad looking situation that Kelly walked in on was the right thing to do. And Kelly wasn’t the enemy, she was just the woman that was lucky enough to date Alex Danvers. However, on the other hand, this was going to be hard because, again, Kelly was the lucky one...Maggie wasn’t, not anymore. ‘Good. We’re getting coffee this afternoon so, hopefully, it’ll go well.’

She wasn’t sure who she was trying to reassure more - Alex or herself.

*** *** ***

She arrives a good fifteen minutes early, wanting to use the time to get settled, to figure out what to say.

Kelly is already there, waiting.

 _Great_.

Maggie orders and tries to think as the machines whir and the barristas yell - _tries_ being the operative word. She’s got nothing except an overwhelming sense of awkwardness and eighteen plus months of heartache that she fears is only going to get worse as she sips on a Macchiato.

‘Hey.’

Kelly looks up but doesn’t say anything, her face impassive.

 _This is going to be fun_. ‘I appreciate you coming, especially since we didn’t exactly start off on the right foot.’

And now she cuts right to it. ‘Why were you with my girlfriend?’

Maggie’s honest, just like she planned on being because she has absolutely nothing to hide. ‘Because she asked me to be there. I wouldn’t have come otherwise, I haven’t spoken to her in almost two years.’ A little over twenty months to be more exact, not that she was counting, or that she could ever forget.

The answer isn’t satisfactory. ‘And you didn’t think that was weird? To show up after so long?’

‘Not really, no.’ She hadn’t even given it a second’s thought. ‘She asked for me, so I came. It is what it is, nothing more and certainly nothing sinister.’

The silence is heavy.

Maggie wonders whether or not being brutally honest will help her cause or taint it. After a few moments of consideration, she goes for it. ’I love Alex. I’d never take advantage of her, or do anything that’d hurt her, ever.’

The brutal honesty works, though Kelly is still far from pleased. ‘A heads up would’ve been nice.’

‘Yeah, try telling that to Kara, who didn’t even tell me you existed.’

Kelly fidgets with her cup. ‘Kara can be...frustrating.’

Admittedly, Kara’s perky attitude wasn’t for everyone but Maggie couldn’t help but sense sort of tension, and couldn’t help but wonder if Kara had other reasons for not mentioning her. ‘She always means well.’

Kelly flicks a brow, as if confirming those suspicions, before another lull falls between them.

Once again, it’s Maggie that breaks it. ‘So, uh...how did you meet Alex?’

‘Through my brother.’

She can’t help but ask, if not out of curiosity but for the sake of maintaining some sort of dialog. ‘Who’s your brother?’

‘James Olsen.’

Now Maggie can pinpoint the resemblance. ‘He never told me he had a sister.’

‘You know him?’

‘Yeah, we’re friends. Or, were friends, I don’t know, Alex got the friends in the break-up, I haven’t heard from him since.’ Winn had been the only one she’d regularly kept in touch with, though J’onn had made sure to reach out at birthdays and Christmases with cards.

‘It must have been hard.’

It almost feels as if she’s rubbing it in. ‘It has been. She’s a special woman.’ _Extraordinary_ , to say the least.

And sinking the knife further and further in. ‘She is.’

Maggie wishes she could just leave but if Kelly was doing this on purpose, then she refuses to give her the satisfaction. ‘How long have you been together?’

‘Since May.’

So about three months, give or take. Long enough to get to know each other, and long enough to fall in love. A couple of weeks was all it took for her to know she’d fallen hopelessly in love with Alex Danvers. Some may say that was too early but when you know, you know, and Maggie had known from very early on that Alex was the woman she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.

_If only._

‘Are you seeing anyone?’

‘No. I’ve been focusing on my career. I’m actually moving to Gotham next week.’ A move that doesn’t progress her career in the slightest. But the pay is slightly better, and it’s a different city...so, it’s something. ‘Look I don’t expect us to become friends but we should, and have to be on the same page right now. For Alex.’

Kelly nods. ‘You’re right.’

Maggie knows she’s going to be wasting her time waiting for an apology for the accusations. She stands and takes her coffee cup. ‘You have Alex’s number, I’d suggest reaching out.’

And that’s all; in and out in under five minutes.

She heads back to her apartment, to change and to shower, and to grab a couple of things before heading back to Alex’s.

 _Alex’s_.

It feels weird calling it that. It used to be _home_.

She also makes a call to the commissioner in Gotham, asking for her transfer to be delayed a week, citing a family emergency. The request is granted - she’d rearrange travel plans and everything else later.

When she finally gets back to Alex’s - _sighs_ \- she finds the Danvers girls on the couch, watching _Grease_.

Kara’s singing along.

Alex is not but still looks like she’s enjoying it. ‘Hey!’ She pats the empty cushion beside her. ‘Come join before Kara eats the rest of the popcorn.’

Maggie happily does so, snatching the bowl before the Kryptonian can take anymore. ‘This seem familiar?’

‘No,’ Alex shakes her head but it doesn’t sadden her. ‘But a park of memory loss is that you can watch all your favorite movies for the first time again.’

‘Well, that’s a silver lining.’

‘Also--.’

Kara shushes her.

Alex tries again, whispering this time. ‘Also Kelly got in touch.’

‘Oh?’ _Oh_.

‘Yeah,’ Alex nods. ‘She thinks we should take things slowly, as if we were dating from the beginning again, get to know each other again.’

‘Oh.’ Maggie wills herself to say something else, to not sound so heartbroken or so jealous. ‘That’s...that's a good idea.’

‘Yeah, I guess it is,’ Alex says, sounding unconvinced.

‘Oh!’ Kara, who’s not been paying a single ounce of attention to the conversation, excitedly claps her hands. ‘This is my favorite!’

The irony of the number that follows is not lost on Maggie in the slightest.

_We go together,_

_Like rama lama lama ka dinga da dinga dong..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thoughts?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love reading all your thoughts and feelings about this fic...very interesting ;)

_ Piccolo Sogno _ .

The restaurant's name translates to  _ little dream _ in English. It’s fancy, a beautiful little building that overlooks the waterfront. It’s also a five star establishment, and Alex feels woefully underdressed in her simple white blouse and blue jeans.

A gentlewoman, Kelly pulls the chair out for her. ‘Do you remember this place?’

‘I can’t say that I do,’ Alex sits down, taking in the candles as a waitress places two menus in front of them. ‘Have we been here before?’

‘We went here for our first date.’ Kelly smiles.

Alex can only take her word for it.

‘You had the polpo, I had the gnocchi and we both had this amazing wine,’ she runs a finger down the menu. ‘Ah, there it is, the  _ Cabernet Sauvignon _ . It was so good.’

Alex’s stomach drops when she sees the price.  _ $225 _ . ‘We really ordered that?’ It’s not unaffordable; she’s not rich but her more than comfortable salary allows for the occasional extravagance if she so wished. It is, however, a lot to spend on something that’d be gone within the hour.   

‘We did though, sadly, we can’t tonight. You’re not allowed to drink so it’s water or soft drinks.’

_ Thank god _ . ‘I think I’ll just have water.’ 

‘So, Al, do--.’

‘Don’t.’ Her shutdown of that nickname feels like second nature, and she instantly feels bad for the harshness of it. ‘Sorry, I, uh, I just don’t like that name. It reminds me of the guy with the beard from  _ Home Improvement _ .’ She wasn’t sure where that random little tidbit of memory came from but there it was. ‘Can you please not call me that?’

‘Of course,’ Kelly says, quickly diverting her gaze back to the menu. She clears her throat, tries again. ‘Do you just want to order what we had back then?’

Alex does not. ‘I think I’ll have pizza.’ As if she’d ever have octopus when she had a wide variety of pizzas to choose from. Between that and those $200 bottles of wine, she wasn’t sure who that Alex was....

*** *** ***

They’re there for nearly two hours before hailing a cab.

Hand in hand, they walk into Alex’s apartment complex and take the elevator up to her floor. They stand outside and make small talk.

Then Kelly goes for it, a kiss.

Alex pulls away so violently she risks adding whiplash to her list of concerns. ‘I’m sorry.’

Her date looks mortified, the fake smile that she tries to hide behind not enough. ‘It’s okay, there’s no need to apologise. I’m moving too fast.  _ I’m  _ sorry.’

The apology wasn’t needed either. It wasn’t her fault, they were a couple after all...supposedly. Yet Alex still feels the need to explain. ‘It’s just...I don’t know you. And kissing is, well, it’s intimate, right? And it doesn’t feel right, not right now.’ The hand holding too had felt a little... _ off _ .

‘That’s fine, that’s totally understandable.’

And then there was the night itself. Kelly was nice, and she was pretty but she just...well, to be completely honest, she was boring. Maybe it was just nerves or the awkwardness of it all but something had felt lacking, and Alex had felt more of a connection with the waitress that had duly served them all night long. ‘Maybe next time?’

‘Of course,’ Kelly nods.

They stand there awkwardly for a few seconds before Alex opts for a hug. They exchange goodbyes before Alex retreats into her apartment.

‘How did it go?’

Alex sighs as she drops down onto the couch beside Maggie.

‘That good, huh?’

‘Are you sure she’s really my girlfriend?’

Maggie’s smile is kind, sympathetic. ‘You’re still not sure about Kara being your sister, you need to give it a little more time.’

‘But that’s Kara,’ Alex counters. ‘We’re sisters, sisters can be different. We don’t choose them, we’re stuck with them. But Kelly is my girlfriend and yet I don’t know why she is, we don’t seem similar.’

‘Opposites attract?’

‘And opposites also sit in near silence for the whole date because they don’t know what to talk about? Yes, I’m aware that I’m missing a good chunk of my memory but it was also...you know, the vibe?’ She runs a hand through her hair. ‘And this is gonna sound rude but I don’t think she has a sense of humour. I made three solid jokes and she didn’t laugh at a single one.’

‘Your jokes can be lame, Alex.’

‘You’d always laugh at them.’

Much like she laughed at that comment too. ‘Yeah, because they were  _ that lame _ .’

‘Rude.’

‘True,’ Maggie fires back. ‘It was your, kinda, first date. First dates can be awkward.’

Theirs hadn’t been. Granted they’d already been good friends and had kissed and made out prior but a million butterflies had still danced in Alex’s stomach that evening, as she’d worried about anything and everything that could go wrong. She needn’t have worried though, every second had been absolutely perfect.

She’d remember that kiss in the rain forever.

Much like she’d remember tonight too...for entirely different reasons. ‘What do you think I should do? Go on another date?’

Maggie shrugged. ‘What do you want to do?’

‘I...don’t know.’ As awful as the evening was, Kelly was still her girlfriend, meaning there had to be some reason why - she might not know a lot of things right now, but she knew she wasn’t one to jump into any kind of relationship without a good reason. She dated Maggie because Maggie was kind, funny and selfless.

And absolutely gorgeous too, though that’d just been a bonus.

‘This isn’t a decision that I can make for you. You just have to do what feels right. Without your memories, it’s all you really can do.’

That was true but Alex didn’t want to dwell on her night right now, her focus instead shifting to the TV. ‘What are you watching?’

‘ _ Parks and Recreation _ .’

‘Is that about National Parks?’

‘Kinda,’ Maggie grins. ‘But it’s a comedy. It’s fun.’

‘ _ Fun _ and  _ National Parks _ ...not really two phrases I’d associate with each other.’

Her ex laughs. ‘There she is. The Alex Danvers that’d always complain if I so much as mentioned going for a hike because she hates nature.’

‘I don’t want to get eaten by mosquitos, thank you very much.’ Again, the clapback comes out instinctively, and she can’t help but wonder if it’s tied to memories of the woman she’s sitting with, or if things are, slowly but surely, starting to come back. She, however, doesn’t remember this show,  _ Parks and Recreation  _ at all. ‘Do I like this?’

Maggie offers no clues. ‘Watch it and see for yourself.’

She toes off her boots and relaxes back. The irony of finding time with her ex more comfortable than a date with her own girlfriend isn’t at all lost on her.

*** *** ***

It feels familiar.

Not the show but the situation - watching TV, Maggie right beside her, dimples out as she laughs.

And she likes this.

She  _ loves  _ this.

The only thing she doesn’t love is the distance between them on the couch. A lot of her memories concerning Maggie are still relatively hazy and, whilst she can’t recall any one specific memory of them spending an evening like this, she knows they did, and did so many a time.

Except they would be closer.

She can picture laying her head in Maggie’s lap, as Maggie runs fingers through her hair, whispering sweet words, words of love, enjoying every second before she ultimately falls as--.

‘Wanna watch more?’ Maggie’s voice brings her back to this world.

‘Uh, you can if you want.’ It was okay, an enjoyable twenty-odd minutes of television but the political tones of it weren’t her speed. Maggie loved it though, so she was more than content to sit through another episode or two. ‘You decide.’

‘Don’t be silly, it’s your apartment.’

‘That you’re kindly staying in as you look after my sorry ass.’

‘I told you, it’s not a problem, I’m happy to be here.’

Few would be so happy, or as willing, to go to these lengths for someone that’d broken their heart. ‘I can always ask Kara to stay over, you know. So I’m not burdening you.’

‘You’re not a burden,’ Maggie says firmly.

‘I feel like one.’

‘You’re  _ not _ .’

That was debatable but the absurdity of this whole situation wasn’t. ‘This is weird though.’

Maggie shrugs. ‘Yeah, it is. But since when have our lives been even remotely normal?’

From the little she knew and had seen, Alex was going to hazard a guess at  _ never _ . ‘You have work tomorrow, don’t you?’

‘Yeah, about that…’ Maggie’s gaze falls to the ground.

Alex isn’t surprised but feels more useless than ever before. ‘Please tell me you haven’t taken time off to look after me because that’s sweet but it’s not necessary and I don’t want to disrupt your life anymore.’

‘No, I haven’t....I couldn’t because I, uh, I don’t need to take time off.’

It takes a second to click. ‘You quit?’

‘The NCPD, yeah,’ Maggie nods. ‘I’m moving to Gotham.’

The name sounded familiar, in the country somewhere but her shattered memory couldn’t pinpoint it on the map.‘Gotham, that’s…’

‘A couple of thousand miles away.’

The other side of the country. ‘So...far,’ Alex manages.

‘Yeah, a position came up there and I thought, why not?’

‘The Science Division?’

Maggie shakes her head. ‘No, they don’t have one there. I’ll be working homicides.’

‘Right.’ The Science Division was Maggie’s baby. She must be desperate to leave if she was willing to give that up. ‘So when do you go?’

‘I was meant to be leaving this coming week but I got it pushed back.’

‘Maggie…’

Maggie waves her off. ‘It’s fine, Alex. Really. You need someone to give you a little help right now and I’d rather it was someone that you knew, rather than a stranger. You’d do the same for me.’

She would, without question. ‘That’s true.’

Maggie’s phone buzzes and whatever message she’s been sent causes her to break out into a smile.

It dawns on Alex then that maybe Maggie’s seeing someone too, and she feels bad for not thinking to ask, and feels even worse as she realizes that the past few days have revolved solely around her, as evidenced by the fact that she’s only found out now about the move to Gotham. ‘Who is it?’

‘Kayla,’ Maggie replies. ‘Well, not Kayla herself, but her social worker. She said Kayla wanted me to see this.’ She turns the phone to show a drawing of a cop with long dark locks.

‘It’s you.’

Maggie beams. ‘She calls me  _ Detective Maggie _ .’

‘That’s adorable.’

‘It is.’ The dimples manage to deepen that little bit more as she looks back at the screen. ‘I was thinking of visiting her in the next few days, just to make sure she’s doing okay.’

And there it was once again. The selflessness. Always putting others before herself, and never once complaining that nobody ever took a second to ask how she was doing. ‘You go above and beyond, you know that?’

‘I like helping people. It’s why I’m a cop.’

And why she was one of the best damn cops. ‘Can I come?’

‘To see Kayla?’

‘Yeah, if that’s okay?’ She knew she wasn’t getting cleared tomorrow, and knew that she was likely going to be shelved for a while. It’d be nice to get out of the apartment and do something, maybe even make a difference too.

‘I’ll check with Maria, her social worker, but yeah, I think that’d be okay.’

‘Great.’ Alex couldn’t wait. ‘Maggie?’

‘Hm?’

‘I think we can squeeze in a couple more episodes if you want.’

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah.’ It may not be Alex’s choice of viewing but it seemed to be Maggie’s, and it was about time that somebody put Maggie first.

*** *** ***

Alex has an appointment with Doctor Jacobs in the morning.

Her dread about it is evidenced by the way she picks at her breakfast. 

The concussion symptoms had eased, as had the pain from bruised ribs and her sprained wrist but that was it. Her memory was just as fractured and she was far from being in any sort of mental shape to run the DEO. That meant she was about to be sidelined indefinitely, and there was nothing that Alex hated more than being idle.

And there was nothing that Maggie could do about it, except try to cheer her up by adding some agave to her coffee. ‘You like that?’

‘Yes,’ Alex replies, licking her lips.

It took Maggie weeks to get Alex to even consider trying it when they’d been together. Alex was stubborn, and that stubbornness was only heightened whenever she saw something had been purchased from  _ Whole Foods _ . ‘Maybe this, in its own convoluted way, is a blessing. When was the last time you took a vacation?’

Alex frowns. ‘You’re really asking someone with amnesia that?’

_ Shit _ .  _ Though to be fair _ … ‘Amnesia or not, you probably wouldn’t be able to answer that anyway. You never take your vacation.’

‘I guess,’ she mumbles.

Maggie’s phone buzzes on the worktop. It’s Maria. ‘Do you want to see Kayla after your appointment?’

Alex perks up. ‘Yes.’

*** *** ***

Heads turn as Maggie walks through the DEO with Director Danvers.

She can only imagine the sort of things they’re thinking but, however, knows all too well, the sort of pitying looks they’d have offered their superior when they noticed that ring was missing.

‘Want me to come in with you?’

Alex shakes her head. ‘I think I can manage. Thank you.’

‘Okay, I’ll be somewhere about here when you’re done.’ She turns and heads in the direction of the elevators where she, quite literally, runs into a familiar face.

It’s odd seeing the Martian dressed in a leather jacket and jeans within these walls. The bright red visitor’s badge clipped onto his belt completes the very odd look. ‘Just the girl I wanted to see.’

‘Hey J’onn,’ she smiles. ‘How you been?’

‘It’s been weird adjusting to life outside of here but, yeah, it’s been good.’ He’s considerate enough to not ask her the same question, knowing the answer without the need to read her mind. ‘Are you headed somewhere?’

She shakes her head. ‘I was going to go grab a coffee. Alex is at her appointment, so I was just going to loiter around here, waiting for her.’

He gestures to the corridor that she just came along, and she happily walks alongside him. ‘Kara told me you’ve been looking after her.’

‘Yeah, that’s been...nice.’ And for the most part, it has been, though she wished the circumstances were better. ‘A little awkward at times but, ultimately, there’s no animosity. We’re friends, and I still care for her. I just want to make sure she’s okay.’

They stop at, and enter a small and empty breakroom. J’onn locks the door to ensure that they aren’t interrupted. ‘Did Kara tell you about the mindwipe?’

Maggie sits down on one of the battered leather couches. ‘She did and it doesn’t surprise me. Making big sacrifices, putting others first...that’s Alex in a nutshell.’

He nods in agreement. ‘And she also told you about the possible complications?’

‘Correct.’ And as more time passed, Maggie couldn’t help but fear that possibility was becoming a reality. ‘There’s more to this, isn’t there?’

He takes a seat opposite her, clasping his hands together. ‘In a sense, though I must stress that none of it is fact but, rather, a belief of my people.’

‘Of course.’

J’onn continues. ‘And we, my people, believe that there’s a reason why Alex would only remember one thing which, in this instance, is you.’

Maggie’s heart skips a beat. She thinks she can see where he’s headed with this but she needs to hear it. ‘Which is?’ 

‘That you were the last thing on her mind before she got hurt.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> see? a nice cliffhanger this time...right??
> 
> thoughts?


	5. Chapter 5

It’s a belief.

It’s not a fact.

It’s not necessarily true.

Yet Maggie can’t shake the feeling that it might be, that Alex’s life flashed before her eyes and all she could think about was her.

She tries putting herself in the same position, tries imagining what’d be on her mind should she herself think the end was impending and she gets the same answer every time.

Alex.

It’s always Alex.

As she used to do from time to time, she looks to the wise man in front of her for advice. ‘What do you think, J’onn?’

Unable to provide a definitive answer, he shrugs. ‘As you know every mind works differently. However, as a Martian, I would be inclined to believe my people.’ He rubs his chin. ‘And, as Alex’s friend, I would also be inclined to believe them. She cares deeply about you, it’s not unfathomable.’

Maybe so but things have changed. ‘She has a girlfriend now.’

‘She does,’ J’onn confirms.

‘So why--.’

He sees where she’s headed. ‘I can’t answer that, and it’d be wrong of me to assume.’

‘Of course, of course.’ She doesn’t want to put him in a weird place either, this situation is already absurd and tough on a lot of parties. ‘It’s just...things seem odd.  _ She _ seems odd. Not the Alex now, that’s the Alex that I know but the old Alex? The Alex before the injury? It doesn’t seem right.’ It seemed completely wrong. ‘She applied, and is approved to adopt yet is telling me now that she’s not desperate to have kids? I don’t understand that.’

J’onn again avoids assumption, opting for a fact. ‘About a year ago, she tried to resign.’

‘What?’

‘It’s true,’ he nods. ‘She only stayed because I was stepping down and chose her as my successor.’

Another thing that made no goddamn sense. ‘Why? She’s worked so hard for this career.’

‘People make rash decisions when they’re in frail emotional states,’ J’onn says. ‘Especially career wise.’ It feels pointed, as if he knew. Maybe he did, he was psychic after all and Kara was a gossip. 

It also feels true. Her job in the Science Division meant the world to her. The GCPD might be offering a better paycheck but she’d never been about the money.

She was making a mistake.

And a part of her always knew that, but had been too stubborn to admit it.

J’onn continues. ‘And Alex thought she had to resign to become a mother.’

‘When was this exactly?’

‘May last year.’

‘She wasn’t even approved to adopt back then, why was she rushing like that?’

‘Like I said. Emotions can cloud judgement,’ J’onn reiterates. ‘And that’s why some things just don’t make sense.’

Maggie nods, grateful to have had this conversation.

*** *** ***

J’onn has to leave, a case he’s investigating requiring his immediate attention, so Maggie grabs a coffee and waits outside the doctor’s office.

Her arms are open, and offer a safe space for a downtrodden Alex to walk into. ‘Not good, huh?’

‘Indefinite leave.’

‘I’m sorry,’ Maggie says, holding her that little bit tighter. ‘It’s for the best though, and you will return.’

‘I hope so,’ Alex mumbles.

‘You  _ will _ .’ Very few things could keep Alex Danvers at bay, and a broken memory seemed a very feeble foe. She’d be back before she knew it.

The elevator pings in the distance and, of course, a certain person emerges from it. ‘What happened?’

Maggie feels Alex tense up at Kelly’s voice before Alex quickly pulls away, obviously not wishing to cause anymore drama. ‘I, uh...I’m not getting cleared anytime soon.’

‘Oh baby, I’m sorry.’ Kelly goes for a hug.

However Alex waves her off. ‘You know what it’s fine, I expected it. I can barely remember my own name, there’s no way in hell they’re letting me back in charge anytime soon. Maggie’s right, it’s for the best,’ she says, crossing her arms, putting on a brave front. ‘I, uh...I didn’t know you were coming.’

Kelly smiles. ‘I thought I’d drop by and see if you wanted to go get some lunch?’

‘Oh I don’t know if I can,’ Alex turns to Maggie. ‘We were going to go see Kayla now, weren’t we?’

‘ _ Kayla _ ?’ Kelly questions.

Maggie nods. ‘She’s a little girl I met whilst responding to a disturbance. Her parents were murdered and she, understandably, is having a tough time right now.’

‘Oh that...that sounds awful.’

‘It was.’ Maggie could still picture that crime scene perfectly. ‘If you wanna go get lunch with Alex then that’s fine, we can go afterwards.’

Alex is quick with a possible amendment. ‘Or we could all go for lunch together?’

It sounds like an awful idea but she sees what Alex is doing, trying to act like the peacemaker, similar to how she’d been with Emily a couple of years ago. Maggie shrugs. ‘If that’s okay, I don’t want to step on any toes here,’ she says, though secretly revels in the fact that Kelly has no choice but to play nice - she feels bad for thinking that way but until she gets an apology for those earlier ugly accusations then she won’t hold back from being that little bit petty.

And, of course, Kelly has to agree. ‘Sure, why not?’

*** **** ***

It’s painfully awkward.

And not for the anticipated reasons.

Alex votes to go to  _ In N’Out _ .

Despite her best efforts to hide it, Kelly looks appalled by the suggestion. She goes ahead with it anyways, looking woefully out of place in the establishment dressed in her smart, and likely very expensive, pantsuit.

Maggie has to bite her tongue to stop herself from laughing as Kelly picks at a cheeseburger - its borderline farcical, like something out of a movie...

Especially when Alex cracks a joke.

And Maggie laughs.

But Kelly does not.

...a movie like  _ The Odd Couple _ .

Granted the joke was lame but that was Alex’s brand and you grew to love it. If you didn’t, well...it seemed hard to picture anyone choosing to suffer through it.

_ It just seemed hard to picture Alex and Kelly together _ .

Sure, Maggie knows she’s biased but she also knows Alex, and knows her very well. She’s seen her vulnerable, and she’s seen her guarded; seen the stoicism, and the goofiness; seen the heartbreak and the sheer joy. She’d seen so much in such a relatively short space of time but what she can’t see is this - Alex and Kelly as an item.

It just doesn’t seem right.

‘Ooh, you know,  _ The Voice _ starts tonight, we could watch it together.’

It isn’t right. Maggie chokes on her soda at the thought. ‘Alex watching that?’

Kelly doesn’t follow. ‘Yeah, why not? We watched the finale together.’

Alex laughs. ‘Yeah, okay, I hate that show.’ And with a passion. It was nothing personal against that show as such; rather, it was all talent shows that Alex hated. Maybe she was pretending to like it for the sake of her girlfriend...but there was no way Alex could realistically hide her detest for that TV format. 

Yet Kelly seems so sure. ‘You loved it.’

Maggie has to resist the urge to pinch herself. This can’t be real. This has to be some sort of weird twisted dream or, since it wasn’t out of the realm of possibility with her career, some sort of parallel universe she’d stumbled into. Something was off. Really off.

And Alex feels it too, turning to Maggie as if she’s desperately seeking some sort of answer.

It pains Maggie not to be able to offer one.

*** *** ***

Kelly and Alex part with a hug.

Alex is quiet as they drive to see Kayla.

Maggie is too.

It’s a delicate situation, not one she should (or wants) to intervene in.

If it’s meant to be, it’ll be. 

*** *** ***

As always, the little girl gives the biggest welcome.

Maggie waits until Kayla pulls away from the hug before acknowledging Alex, who’s standing by the wall, watching and waiting to be introduced.  ‘I hope you don’t mind but I brought a friend with me.’

‘Is she a cop too?’ Kayla asks.

‘Kinda.’ Alex’s career is hard enough to describe to an adult, let alone a kid, so she keeps it vague. ‘She’s also a doctor too. You wanna meet her?’

It’s a hesitant nod, but a nod nonetheless.

Alex comes over and crouches to the girl’s height. ‘Hi. My name is Alex.’

The little girl seems fascinated by the visitor’s badge that’s clipped onto Alex’s jacket.

She may have only spent a couple of hours with the kid but Maggie knows Kayla’s guard is up, that she’s scared and nervous of this new person entering into a safe space. It’s only natural given the poor kid heard her parents being murdered. She gets down next to Alex to reassure. ‘Alex is best friends with Supergirl.’

That gets Kayla’s attention. ‘Supergirl?’

And Alex goes along with it, even if her memories of Supergirl are, right now, non-existent. ‘I am and she’s really cool. Like  _ super _ cool.’

That’s all it takes to get Kayla to open up, to know that Alex is one of the good guys in a world that’s already been so cruel to her in her five short years.

They get on like a house on fire.

At times, Maggie feels like the third wheel despite being the one that made the introduction. And, honestly? She doesn’t mind in the slightest, happy to see them both having so much fun with  _ LEGO _ given how rough the past few days have been.

‘That house you built is almost as tall as Maggie.’

Kayla giggles.

Maggie pouts. ‘Rude.’

‘True though.’

It’s nice to see Alex not having to worry about remembering little details. It’s the first time Maggie’s seen her truly relaxed, happy.

‘Look!’ Alex holds up a little uniformed figure. ‘It’s you. You got even tinier.’

Try as she might, Maggie can’t fight the smile tugging at her lips. ‘Yeah, well, why don’t you build me a house instead of laughing at me?’

Alex gives Kayla a gentle nudge. ‘You hear that?  _ Detective Maggie _ wants us to build her a house. Think we can do that?’

Kayla keenly accepts the challenge.

*** *** ***

Time flies by so quickly they lose track.

They’re there for almost three hours before Maria gently reminds them of the time and they say their goodbyes.

‘How are things going on the fostering front?’ Maggie asks.

‘We’re still trying,’ Maria replies. ‘We’ve had several prospective foster parents come in but she completely shuts off around them.’

‘She seemed okay with me,’ Alex says. ‘And we’d just met.’

‘You aren’t a foster carer though.’

The penny drops. ‘Actually, I’m approved to adopt.’

Maggie can see the cogs turning, and she isn’t sure she’s liking where this is going. She gently tugs at her ex’s sleeve. ‘Alex…’

‘Isn’t that the same thing?’

‘It is very similar,’ Maria answers. ‘You would have already passed the background checks and all the necessary assessments. There’d be some different paperwork to quickly get through but, realistically, we would consider you.’

‘Then consider me. Please.’ And there it was, the impulsiveness that she was famed for; the impulsiveness that sometimes never worked out.

And Maggie would be damned if that sweet kid suffered more heartbreak because of that impulsiveness. ‘Can we have a moment alone?’

‘Of course,’ Maria smiles and steps out of the room.

Maggie waits until the door is closed. ‘Alex...this is a big decision.’

‘And? My gut tells me it’s the right one.’

That meant nothing. Her gut had also told her to propose without ensuring they were on the same page about a certain dealbreaker. ‘You just met this kid, and you said yourself that the adoption stuff didn’t seem right.’

‘I know, I know but...Kayla needs a home. And I could give her that, especially now when work isn’t a problem. I’ve got nothing else to do...but I could make a difference.’

‘You could, yes, but boredom isn’t grounds for fostering a child. You need to think this through. _Really_ think this through,’ Maggie stresses. ‘This is a big ask. You don’t know how long you’d end up looking after her. It could be a few days, it--.’

‘Could be a few weeks, yeah, I know. It could even be a couple of years, the average time a child is in foster care is two years.’ Her eyes went wide at the fact. ‘Where...where the hell did that come from?’

Maggie’s just as surprised. ‘You remembered that?’

Alex nods. ‘I...did.’

Then again, Maggie’s not really surprised - Alex was always the person that retained facts and statistics. ‘You probably read that when you were applying to adopt.’ Unless she’d picked up a leaflet on the way in, that was, realistically, the only way she’d know such a fact. ‘Can you remember anything else?’

Alex’s brow furrows as she tries to tap into that area of memories. She gives it a few moments before shaking her head. ‘No, that...that seems to be it.’ 

‘Okay.’ Maggie smiles before gesturing over to the two seats by the wall. ‘Look. You’re in a position to give that kid a great home but please...think this through.’ Those earlier wise words were still on her mind. ‘Emotions can make people make rash decisions. And the last thing that kid needs is more upheaval in her life.’ And those wise words had made things clearer for herself too. ‘I’m going to let the Commissioner in Gotham know that I won’t be joining them. That job isn’t the right fit for me, I can’t go.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘Certain.’ And she was, absolutely.

‘So what will you do?’

‘Look to getting my old job back but, in the meantime, if you want to take Kayla in and need someone to help you, I’ll be that someone.’ After all, that was why she wanted to be a cop, to help those in need, to make a difference. ‘But only if you’re sure that this is the right call. I’d take her in myself if I could.’

Alex nods. ‘I’m sure.’

Paperwork permitting, it seems like this was about to happen. ‘Okay. Let’s talk to Maria.’

*** *** ***

The next forty-eight hours are a blur.

Maggie resigns from a job she’s never started.

Alex becomes Kayla’s emergency foster carer.

A couple of hours before the move becomes official, they head to  _ Target  _ to buy anything and everything they could think of that a kid would need.

‘Colouring books,’ Maggie says as she dumps a stack in the cart. ‘That girl loves to colour.’

‘With pencils or crayons?’ Alex asks.

Maggie shrugs. ‘I don’t think she has a preference. Get both. And pens too, but make sure they’re washable ones.’

‘ _ Washable _ ?’

‘So the ink can easily wash off. Lemme look.’ She gently pushes Alex out of the way to get a better look at the shelves, her eyes quickly landing of a pack of  _ Crayola _ . ‘These will do.’ She grabs two and adds it to the rest. ‘What else?’

*** *** *** 

They rejig the apartment to make things work, Alex’s kingsize pushed close to one wall, whilst a little kiddie bed sits next to the other - Maggie’s still happy on the couch. 

It’s not much but at least it’s, for now, a home.

They’d bought a lot in preparation for welcoming Kayla but one thing they hadn’t had to buy was movies - Kara had every  _ Disney  _ flick  on DVD and was more than happy to let them borrow them.

‘Pick which one you wanna watch, and I’ll go get the popcorn,’ Alex smiles before turning to Maggie. ‘You want a beer?’

‘Please,’ she replies.

‘ _ Nemo _ !  _ Nemo _ !’ Kayla excitedly waves a case in the air.

‘Well that was quick,’ Maggie chuckles. ‘I think we’ve got a winner.’

There’s a knock at the door, Alex diverts on her way to the kitchen to answer. Her smile soon fades, dissolving into a stutter. ‘Oh, h-hey, I...I wasn’t expecting you.’

Maggie can’t see who it is from the couch but recognises the voice.

Kelly’s timing is always impeccable and, once again, she hasn’t been informed of the situation - though, this time, that had been Alex’s choice, as she figured telling her about Kayla was something better done at a later date.

Again, it looks bad.  _ Happy  _ _families_. 

Again, Kelly doesn’t seem pleased to have been left in the dark.

Not pleased at all in fact. ‘I-I can’t do this. I’m sorry. It’s over, Alex.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ......oh.
> 
> thoughts???


	6. Chapter 6

Shellshocked, Alex can only stand there.

Maggie, however, is up on her feet, chasing after the woman that’d dropped the bombshell.

The elevator’s sitting there empty, so she heads for the stairs, finding Kelly two flights down. ‘You don’t get to do this.’

Kelly stops. ‘Why? Isn’t this what you want? To have her all to yourself? Because go ahead, she’s all yours.’

Maggie’s knuckles whiten with anger at another accusation, at the disrespect. ‘She almost died and she barely knows who she is and you’re what? Running away?’ She knew what it was like to be abandoned, and she didn’t recommend it. ‘You’re pathetic.’

‘It’s not exactly easy--.’

‘And you think it’s easy for me?’ Maggie’s having none of it. ‘I lost everything when I lost her and yet I’m still here, I’m not running away.’

‘I’m not running away, it’s just...she’s different, okay?’

‘Yeah, head injuries can do that to someone,’ Maggie says. ‘She’s confused, and she’s scared. It’s challenging, yeah, but if you cared about her then you’d be staying, you’d be patient, you’d be doing anything and everything you can to make sure that she’s okay. Not getting butthurt because she’s selflessly giving up her time to look after a kid that needs a home.’ She remembers their conversation from the other day. ‘That’s Kayla, by the way. That kid who heard her parents getting murdered.’

Kelly looks down at the ground. ‘She...she has nothing to do with it. I...I didn’t come here tonight for a date, or whatever...I came here to break-up with her.’

The words hang heavy for a few seconds. ‘Why? You’re still her girlfriend, why are you giving up just like that?’

‘Because she’s not happy with me,’ Kelly replies. ‘She’s...she’s never been happy with me.’

‘But--.’

‘I thought we were happy.  _ I _ was happy...but Alex?’ She shakes her head. ‘She wasn’t, the past week or so has been proof of that. Hearing how she’d talk about you and now seeing you together? That’s happiness, real happiness.’

_ Real _ . One word that Maggie would always use to describe their time together. Nothing about it had been fake. They were two people in love, so ridiculously in love that they’d, seemingly, overlooked a thing or two. ‘She’d talk about me?’

‘Constantly,’ Kelly nods. ‘And she’d always apologise for it, and try not to do it but it just kept happening. She misses you,’ she says. ‘And she loves you. So much.’

That Maggie knew. That had never been the problem. ‘We broke up for a reason.’

A reason that, right now, Kelly doesn’t seem to care about. ‘Do you know what I do for a living?’

It’s never came up. ‘I do not.’

‘I’m a therapist,’ she replies. ‘And whilst I try my hardest not to analyse the people in my personal life, it’s not difficult to see what's going on. You don’t need any training for that, just a few hours with her.’

‘And that is?’

‘I can’t say,’ Kelly shakes her head. ‘I’m sorry, it’s part of what I do, it’s my career and I don’t want to say anything that’d breach someone’s confidence. Just...spend time with her, and you’ll figure it out soon enough, I promise.’

Easier said than done. ‘She barely remembers anything right now, how is that possible?’

‘She remembers you. That’ll be enough,’ the woman forces a smile, a smile that quickly fades. ‘I’m sorry for acting like a bitch earlier, I really am. It’s just--.’

‘The situation looked bad, I get it.’

‘That and I...I felt threatened because I know that I can’t possibly compete against you.’ She looks ashamed. ‘You’re a good person, you didn’t deserve any of that and I’m truly sorry for any hurt I caused.’

‘Thank you.’ 

Turning to leave, Kelly adjusts the bag on her shoulder. ‘Take care of her for me. Please?’

Maggie nods. ‘I will.’

‘Thanks,’ Kelly says, awkwardly hovering for a few seconds before finally going.

Maggie takes her time heading back up, not sure of what to say or, hell, what to do when she gets back to the apartment, back to the woman that’s still, apparently, very much in love with her.

Fortunately, it’s a topic that looks unlikely to come up anytime soon.

Kayla has to come first

And Kayla really wants to watch  _ Nemo _ .

*** *** ***

The clownfish and his friends are more than enough to distract from the giant fucking elephant in the room.

Kayla laughs.

Maggie laughs.

Alex laughs.

An hour and forty-four minutes pass quickly and comfortably. The hardest part comes when it’s all over and they have to break the news that it’s way past bedtime - even then that doesn’t prove all too difficult, the promise of a bedtime story enough to do the trick.

Alex holds out a tattered looking book. ‘Can you can read?’

She looks at the dogeared cover. ‘ _ The Curious Kitten _ . See? I can read. Can you?’ She grins.

‘And you think my jokes are bad?’

‘All that time spent with you has clearly rubbed off on me.’ She takes the book. ‘Is this Kayla’s?’

‘No, I...I think it was mine? Or maybe Kara’s.’ Alex shrugs. ‘I’m not sure, Kara dropped it off yesterday so I’m guessing it means something.’

And Alex wants to listen to it, to see if it triggers something. Maggie gets it. ‘Yeah, I’ll read.’

So Maggie does, squished up with Kayla in the little kiddie bed whilst Alex sits cross-legged on the floor.

She goes all out, making all the various sound effects, including those of the many, many different animal friends the titular  _ Curious Kitten _ makes.

A few pages from the end, she looks up.

Alex’s smile is big, and it’s directed at her.

It causes Maggie to stumble over words, to forget to do the noises.

Someone doesn’t forget. ‘You didn’t quack!’

Maggie can’t let the kid down, starting the page over and quacking, all whilst, out of the corner of her eyes, she sees that smile grow wider and wider.

*** *** ***

It’s only after they say goodnight to Kayla that they realize they’ve overlooked the distinct lack of walls in the apartment.

Turning on the TV felt risky.

As did keeping on any light even remotely near her.

So instead they retreat to the kitchen area, switch on the light above the island and sit there, a heavy silence falling as the elephant trampled back in, killing the earlier, and much lighter, mood.

It’s Alex that finally speaks. ‘So...we’re not going to talk about Kelly?’

It’s not a case of whether or not she wants to talk about her. She simply just doesn’t see that it’s her place to bring her up. ‘Do  _ you _ want to talk about Kelly? Because if you want to, we can but if you--.’

‘I’m glad she dumped me.’

Well, there it was.

And it kept coming. ‘I might not know a lot of things right now but I know we weren’t right together. I don’t even know why we were together. Like it doesn’t make sense. You went for lunch with us. You saw how awkward that was. She didn’t laugh at any of my jokes.’

As much as she wants to remain neutral, Maggie can’t help but state a fact. ‘If you don’t learn to love your sense of humour then, well, you’re kinda screwed.’

‘Right?’ Alex laughs. ‘It’s just...I don’t know. I really don’t know.’

‘Do you remember anything about her?’

A shake of the head. ‘Nothing. Absolutely nothing. But that doesn’t matter, it’s not about what I know, it’s about what I feel. And I feel nothing towards her.’ She grimaces. ‘That sounds harsh, she is a nice person she’s just...not right for me.’

‘And that’s okay. You’re entitled to feel that way, that doesn’t make you a bad person.’

‘I know, I know…’ She tails off, shaking her head. ‘It’s not important anymore. It’s over, that’s it. Right now, I gotta focus on Kayla.’

Maggie nods. ‘Right.’

‘And today...that went well, right?’

Another nod. ‘I think we did pretty good.’ Her experience may be limited to a few nights spent babysitting neighbour kids during her latter high school years but she’d still say they did good. Kayla had been nothing but happy and there’d been no accidents of any sorts - that was a home run parenting wise. ‘Tomorrow will be harder but if we keep doing we’re doing, I think we’ll be good.’

‘Tomorrow will be harder though,’ Alex says. ‘Much harder.’

‘We’ll get through it,’ Maggie reassures. ‘Maria is only one phone call away if we need her.’ Speaking of phones, she decides to check hers for the first time that evening. One text. From J’onn.

_ Drop by my office when you have a moment. Would love to chat _ .

She owes him that moment. ‘Would you be okay if I leave you and Kayla for a little while tomorrow? J’onn wants to see me.’

‘She’s a good kid, I can’t imagine it’d be a problem,’ Alex replies.

‘And Kara’s only ever a few seconds away if you need her too.’

‘That’s true.’

And it was extremely reassuring. Yet Maggie hopes that phone call would not be needed - one because for obvious reasons; and two, well...she wanted to be there when Kayla met the Girl of Steel, her hero. ‘So...what do we do for the rest of the night?’

‘Yeah,’ Alex chuckles. ‘I really need an apartment with walls, don’t I?’

Some people, however, needed an apartment period. Maggie’s lease officially expired next week and, whilst she may be kipping on Alex’s couch for the foreseeable, she still needs to find a place for her stuff. 

She also needs to find a job too.

That was tomorrow’s problem. Now, she was more than content to toast a successful day. ‘There’s still some beer in the fridge and, I think, leftover pizza. We could have that?’

Alex smiles. ‘Let’s.’

*** *** ***

They sit, chatting.

It's not flirting.

It's friendship.

And that’s what Maggie had missed the most the past year and a bit. Not the kisses, the morning snuggles or even the sex. She’d missed this, just talking with her best friend.

Forming friendships had always been something she’d find difficult. As a kid, she’d been shy, too scared to interact with other kids. It got better as time went on before that fateful February day set it all back, forcing up walls that remain to this day.

Yet, from day one, Maggie let Alex in. Not fully, that had taken a little bit of time but, in comparison to others, it hadn’t taken all that long. In fact, in comparison to others, Alex was the first in a long, long time to get all the way in.

She trusted Alex with her life.

_ Trusts _ .

Maggie still trusts Alex with her life.

‘You know what’s weird?’

‘What?’

Alex hoists her foot up onto the worktop, pushing up the leg of her grey joggers. ‘Finding all these mystery scars.’

It’s a new one, pretty prominent too. ‘I haven’t seen that one.’

‘I asked Kara, she says I broke my tibia at work,’ Alex explains. ‘Well, not me personally. Someone called  _ Reign _ did. Whoever they are, they sound lovely.’

‘Actually, she was.’ Beyond lovely. The news had been shocking. 

‘You knew her?’

‘We both did,’ Maggie says. ‘Her name was Sam Arias, she was one of your sister’s friends.’

‘What happened to her?’

The specifics she did not know, only the gist of it from what Winn had told her. ‘The DEO -  _ you _ \- helped to save her. She and Ruby then moved to Metropolis, fresh start.’

Alex arches a brow. ‘Ruby?’

‘Her daughter.’ The daughter that had ultimately been the catalyst to Maggie’s world turning upside down. 

Oblivious to it all, Alex laughs. ‘God, I feel like Dory.’

And Maggie can’t help but grin. ‘We should watch  _ Finding Dory  _ tomorrow.’

‘Wait. Is that a sequel?’

‘Yep. And even better than  _ Nemo _ .’

‘Impossible.’

Maggie takes a sip of her beer. ‘Trust me, it is.’

Then comes three words that Maggie already knows yet three words that still make her heart skip a beat. ‘I trust you.’

*** *** ***

A jab.

Maggie stirs.

Another jab.

She groans this time.

‘Maggie!’ 

Maggie opens her eyes to find Kayla standing by the couch.

‘Sweetheart,’ Alex emerges from the bathroom and hotfoots it over. ‘I told you not to wake her.’

‘It’s okay,’ Maggie smiles as she sits up. ‘Totally o--.’

‘Why don’t you and Alex sleep together?’

The completely innocent question knocks any words right out of her mouth. 

‘Mommy and daddy sleep together in the big bed,’ the little girl continues. ‘Alex sleeps in the big bed, you don’t. Why?’

The girl was inquisitive. Too inquisitive for this time of morning, especially when her questions tapped into subject areas that, right now, were awkward to tackle at any time of day. But Kayla was just a kid, she didn’t understand these sort of things.

And Kayla was, again, just a kid...and kids would keep asking until they got an answer.

‘Alex and I are friends.’

It’s not enough. ‘Mommy and daddy are friends too.’

_ Are _ . The continued use of the present breaks Maggie’s heart. ‘Not all friends sleep in the big bed together.’ She looks over at Alex, needing a little back-up to drive that answer home. ‘Right, Alex?’

Alex, understandably, looks a little awkward but nods anyways. ‘That’s right. Some friends sleep in different beds.’

‘Maggie’s not got a bed.’

Nothing got past this kid. ‘There’s not enough room for another bed.’

‘What about Alex’s bed? You can sleep with her. It’s big.’

Literally nothing at all. ‘I…’ She thinks fast. She thinks about what it was like. She finds her reason quickly. ‘I can’t because Alex is annoying and she steals the covers.’

Alex scoffs. ‘No, I don’t...do I?’

‘You do,’ Maggie says. ‘One of your worst habits.’ The winter months had been especially bad, and she’d wake up in the middle of the night freezing whilst Alex was trying her best to turn the comforter into her own personal cocoon. 

The excuse satisfies the little girl, who drops her questioning.

Alex looks like she’s about to say something until Kayla tugs at her shirt. ‘Yeah, sweetheart?’

‘Can I get ice-cream?’

Alex chuckles. ‘You just had your breakfast.’

‘Already?’ Maggie frowns. ‘You had breakfast without me?’

‘She woke me up about an hour ago, there was only so long I could go without feeding her,’ she replies. ‘I’m surprised you didn’t wake up, she’s been bouncing off the walls. Kids have  _ a lot _ of energy.’ Her eyes flick down to Kayla. ‘Don’t you?’

‘Can I get ice-cream later?’

‘Yes,’ Maggie says. ‘Actually, I was thinking we go to the playpark later so we could always stop off for ice-cream afterwards?’

Alex smiles. ‘Yes. That works.’

That was the afternoon sorted. Until then Maggie had plans, big plans with a guilty favorite. ‘Hey kiddo, come sit and watch  _ Paw Patrol _ with me.’

*** *** ***

There’s a playpark en-route to J’onn’s office.

Alex and Kayla stop off there, whilst Maggie carries on, promising to meet up with them afterwards - the Martian had offered no clues as to why he wanted to see her but he did say that it wouldn’t take long.

They’d get that ice-cream after.

The office that J’onn’s set up shop in is as cliche as they come, like something straight out of an old movie, the gold lettering on the door, shutter blinds and a bottle of Scotch on the desk.

She digs the vibe. ‘This is cool.’

J’onn gestures for her to sit. ‘Do you want a drink?’

‘No, but thank you.’ Usually she wouldn’t pass but, usually, she didn’t have parental responsibilities. ‘Is business good?’

‘You wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t,’ he says.

‘I’m not sure that I follow.’

He pours a couple of fingers for himself. ‘I heard that you resigned.’

And she had a good idea what little bird had passed on that message. ‘Let me guess...Kara?’

‘Actually, it was Alex.

_ Oh _ .

He downs his drink. ‘And things are picking up here and there’s only so much one man can do.

Now she follows. ‘You want me to work for you?’

‘Not  _ for _ . With,’ he smiles. ‘I know your record and, most importantly, what you stand for. As far as I see, you’re the hottest free agent around. You’re the perfect fit for this agency.’

‘So we’d be partners?’

J’onn nods. ‘Yes. Completely equal. Your name will be up on that door too.’

She looks over at the door, picturing it. ‘ _ Jones and Sawyer... _ I like the sound of that.’  _ Loves  _ the sound of it. She’d always thought she wasn’t one for partners, always used to prefer being a lone wolf but with the right partner, someone she knew had her back? She thrives. ‘Yeah, that sounds good.’

‘So you’ll join me?’

She answers without any hesitation. ‘Yes.’

They shake hands, making the partnership official.

*** *** ***

For the first time in a long time, things are looking up.

She has her best friend back.

She has a job that she’s passionate about.

She’s making a difference with Kayla.

And, right now, she’s headed to the playpark to join Alex and Kayla and then go for ice-cream - and maybe, just maybe, squeeze in a shot on the swings too.

Approaching, she scans the area for a little girl in a bright pink hoodie.

And comes up empty.

She looks for a redheaded lesbian in a leather jacket.

Again, she can’t find one.

It’s not the end of the world. Kids grew restless, and Maggie had spent longer than anticipated at the office...maybe Kayla had begged Alex to take her somewhere else. Therefore, Maggie would find them by calling Alex and asking where they were.

So she calls Alex.

And hears the phone ringing.

The phone that’s laying, face down, underneath a bench.

_ Shit _ .

Maggie picks up it. The screen is shattered so she, carefully, swipes to reject the call. Entering the passkey, her heart sinks when she sees the screen that’s active, the number that Alex had seemingly been about to call.

Kara.

Alex had needed Kara.

It wasn’t too hard to put the pieces together.

It was simple actually, and it was terrifying.

Alex and Kayla were in danger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welp.
> 
> you know the drill. yell at me in the comments :)


	7. Chapter 7

The situation can’t look any worse.

Or so she thinks until she sees Bella, the little stuffed dog that Kayla would carry absolutely everywhere, laying facedown in a puddle, a dirty footprint stamped on her fawn fur. 

With a trembling hand she picks her up, wiping the worst of the mud onto her jeans as she waits for the ringing to cease and for Kara to answer.

‘I need you.’

*** *** ***

Black locks of hair cascade down over her bare shoulder, and an arm is wrapped tightly around her waist.

It’s been a while since she spent the night with someone and, this time, she doesn’t feel quite so ashamed.

Sara was nice but that night had been a mistake. Alex had nothing against one night stands - as long as it was between consenting adults, she didn’t care - they just weren’t for her, especially as that night had been nothing but a drunken mess, a desperate attempt to try and ease the overwhelming loneliness in her life. 

Last night with Kelly though? That’d been okay.

It wasn’t, however, magic like it always had been with Maggie.

Stop. It.

She hates herself for thinking that because Maggie is gone, long gone, and never coming back, as was her chance at experiencing magic--.

Alex wakes with a jolt.

That wasn’t a dream, that was a memory.

The harsh reality.

She should be grateful that stuff is starting to come back to her but she’s not. She can’t dwell on it anyway, as the fogginess fades and the severity of the situation she’s in, right now, emerges. A dark situation too, as she pushes herself to her feet in the near blackness. ‘Kayla?’ She whispers.

No response.

‘Sweetie, are you here?’

Again, nothing.

_ Fuck _ .

And the worst part of it all is that this was all her goddamn fault because she brought a child into the most dangerous environment in the world - her life.

Hands out, she takes a few steps forward, her palms soon coming into contact with metal. She’s in a van, very likely the same van they’d thrown her into when they had ambushed the two of them at the play park. 

_ They _ . Who the fuck was  _ they _ ?

Anyways,  _ they _ had chloroformed her and she’d hit her head on the way down, hence the tender temple and the dried blood.

And, seemingly, the memory too.

She follows the wall of the van, inching her way towards the doors. Locked. Not surprising but it is somewhat interesting because they are, apparently, they only thing standing between her and freedom.

And Kayla.

Her stomach lurches at the thought of harm coming to that sweet little girl. She was supposed to take care of her, to protect her...yet here they were, barely twenty-four hours into fostering her and she’d already been abducted.  _ Great job, Alex. Great fucking job. _

The pity party would have to wait. She has to get out of here and find Kayla - or that was the plan at least.

Her movement inside the van has not gone unnoticed, the lock clicking and the doors opening.

She thinks about lunging at the son of a bitch but is stopped by the sight of the gun - she can’t do anything if she’s dead. She raises her palms. 

Another guy approaches, and shoves her to the ground. ‘Don’t do anything stupid.’

*** *** ***

Kara picks her up, and flies her to the DEO.

It’s reminiscent of when Rick took Alex, the atmosphere just as tense and nervy but the faces around the intel table are different.

Maggie can’t help but wish Winn was here - even in dire situations, he could manage to make her smile, to make her worry that little bit less and, when she needed it, offer a reassuring and soft hug.

Instead a new guy stands in his place, his posture and enunciation perfect. ‘You must be Margarita Sawyer.’

You know the situation is bad when she can’t even be bothered correcting him. ‘And you are?’

‘Querl Dox,’ he replies.

‘We call him Brainy,’ Kara says. ‘He’s kinda the new Winn.’

As much as she hates making rash judgements, she resents the comparison - Winn was her little brother, nobody could even  _ kinda  _ replace him. ‘So you’re the smart guy?’

He nods. ‘A twelfth-level intellect to be pre--.’

She doesn’t care, not right now. ‘Have you tried locating her via her tracker?’

‘Yes but, alas, it is offline.’

Kara offers the explanation. ‘The supersonic blast that took her down last week also took down her tracker. Replacing it, at the time, didn’t seem like a priority.’

That made sense. ‘Okay, so what about cameras? I saw some in the area, we should have decent coverage of the park.’

Brainy taps at his tablet, bringing up a set of images on the big screen. ‘Three masked men. One van. No license plate. Given their disguises, there’s a 0.003151 percent chance of facial recognition being able to identify them.’

Confused, Maggie turns to Kara.

‘Numbers are kinda his thing,’ she explains.

_ Oh _ . ‘What time did they get taken?’ She asks.

And she hates the answer. ‘2:03pm.’

Roughly five minutes before she arrived.  _ Damn _ . If she hadn’t stopped to grab that coffee en-route to J’onn’s, she would’ve been there, she could’ve stopped it.  _ Damn. Damn. Damn.  _ ‘What...what about the network? You can tap into that, can’t you? And try following the van’s movements?’

‘Yes, however, the vehicle does not use main roads. The cameras lose them quickly and there’s a 5.2324--.’

‘Words. Not numbers.’ It’s not the time.

‘Low,’ he says sheepishly. ‘There’s a very low chance of being able to find them but we have agents currently working on doing so.’

‘Well, there’s no way they could’ve done their homework,’ Maggie says. ‘We made the decision to go to that play park just last night so it’s either a complete coincidence that they avoided those cameras or they’re local and know where the sidestreets are.’ She was leaning towards a mix of both. ‘Alright, let’s get back to basics. Who could’ve taken them?’

‘The Director is seeing someone,’ Agent Vasquez pipes up.

‘And?’

‘And maybe she knows something?’ Vasquez suggests. ‘Like recent threats? Or, who knows, maybe she’s behind it all.’

‘Kelly?’ Maggie nearly laughs. ‘No. No way. That woman wouldn’t be able to catch a spider, let alone orchestrate a kidnapping.’

Vasquez shrugs. ‘You never know. All I know is that is one weird relationship, it’s like the director is dating her gynaecologist or something. Which is ironic because that woman, Kelly, needs a proctologist to remove the giant stick that’s up her ass.’

_ Someone wasn’t a fan _ . ‘You not liking her is not a reason to believe she’s behind this.’ If that was the case she’d be the prime suspect in Maggie’s eyes.

‘We should probably tell her though,’ Kara says. ‘And like Vasquez says, she may have some insight on potential leads. Plus, Alex is her girlfriend, she needs to be kept informed.’

‘She’s not.’

Kara frowns. ‘Not what?’

‘Her girlfriend. Not anymore. Kelly dumped her last night.’

‘Kelly what?’

‘What was that about my sister?’

Impeccable timing ran in the family. ‘James, hey--.’

One sibling might have been kept in the dark but the other hadn’t been. ‘I asked Kara. I didn’t ask you, homewrecker.’

And, it seems, that same sibling hadn’t been told the full story. ‘Excuse me?’  _ Fucking Kelly _ .

‘Who the hell do you think you are?’ James was pissed, understandably protective of his sister. ‘Waltzing back into Alex’s life, breaking up her relationship? Alex didn’t want you, get over it.’

The words hurt. Maggie doesn’t let it show. ‘Buddy, you don’t know what you’re talking about.’

‘Really? Because I know my sister loved her.’

Maggie doesn’t doubt it - Alex was easy to love. That wasn’t the problem though. ‘Yeah, well, maybe the feeling wasn’t mutual.’

‘Excuse me?’

Kara steps in, putting herself between Maggie and James before it escalates further. ‘Leave.’

His jaw drops. ‘You’re taking her side? Don’t you want your sister to be happy?’

‘That’s  _ why _ I’m taking her side,’ Kara counters. ‘Leave. Right now. We can talk about this later when my sister and a child aren’t in danger.’

He walks away without another word.

Maggie forces a smile. ‘Thank you.’

Kara nods. ‘She’s my sister, I noticed it too,’ she says before returning to the most pressing matter. ‘So. Where do we start looking? Alex has a list of enemies longer than a phone book, and there’s been no recent threats that I know of, nothing out of the ordinary.’

‘We start with Kayla,’ Maggie says after a few seconds of thought. ‘Her parents were murdered and she goes missing the following week? The more I think about it, the more I don’t think that’s a coincidence.’

Her new partner, J’onn, agrees. ‘Me too. Where are the NCPD in regards to that case?’

‘I’m not sure but I know who’s running point on that investigation. I’ll call, get the latest and we can see where to go from there.’ She turns to the new guy. ‘Tap into the cameras outside of Alex’s apartment. If they followed them to the play park then they’ve probably been watching since Kayla arrived. Watch from midday yesterday onwards. Look for that van or anything that seems even remotely out of place.’

‘I shall.’

‘And I’ll call Kelly,’ Kara says.

‘Thank you.’ Maggie takes a deep breath, trying to steady herself. She’s not had a panic attack in years but she’s sure that she can feel one brewing.  _ Deep breaths _ . It’s the last thing she needs. It’s the last thing Alex and Kayla need too. She has to keep it together, has to stay strong.

Kara says nothing but rests a hand on her back.

_ El mayarah. _

Those words Kara had first uttered to her a couple of years ago, after they’d rescued Alex from the water tank. It was Kryptonian for  _ stronger together _ . They’d worked together back then to get Alex back, and they’d do the same again.

They had to.

She’d only just got Alex back, she couldn’t lose her again.

*** *** ***

They zip tie her arms to the wooden rickety chair they force her down into.

‘Where’s Kayla?’ Alex asks.

The man that is taking charge is, like the two others, wearing a black ski mask but she can see dark eyebrows sticking out above green eyes. ‘She’s safe, don’t worry.’ His accent is thick and southern.

‘ _ Safe _ isn’t a word I’d use to describe an abduction.’

‘ _ Safe  _ isn’t a word I’d use to describe the government either,’ he replies.

They knew. This was about her. Though she still tries to play dumb. ‘What do you mean?’

‘You know what I mean.’

That is what concerns her.

‘You’d have to be pretty fucking ignorant to not know what I mean.’

Or maybe she doesn’t. ‘I’m not sure that I follow.’

He doesn’t elaborate. ‘Maybe that’s for the best,’ he says. ‘We just have a few questions for you, real easy questions. You answer them and we don’t hurt you. And once this is all over, you’ll be free. That is, again, if you play ball.’

She doesn’t believe him, nor does she really know what’s going on. ‘Ask away.’

‘What is the name of Kayla’s case worker?’

‘What?’

He moves to smack her with the butt of his Glock.

She braces for the impact.

He stops, a hair's breadth away from her cheek. ‘That’s how it's gonna go, darling. If you don’t answer the questions then I’m going to have to make you answer. So, I’ll ask you again and I won’t hold back the next time. Who is Kayla’s case worker?’

There was no way that she was going to bring another person into this. ‘I...I don’t know.’

‘Don’t play dumb with me. You fostered that kid so you’ve met her case worker and I want a name.’

‘It’s confidential,’ she tries.

‘Name. Now.’

‘I told you, I can’t it’s--.’

He’s true to his word.

Just like before, the hit triggers another memory.

Of an evening where she’s outside, holding a bottle of wine in her hand as she leans forward to kiss Kelly. ‘Ditto.’

_ Ditto _ .

She’d really fucking said  _ ditto _ after kissing someone.

She'd really fucking kissed Kelly.

Her friend, Kelly.

She'd kissed her friend because she was lonely, because she had a hunch Kelly liked her and because she knew Kelly wanted kids. And that? That wasn't necessarily grounds for a strong, healthy relationship - liking someone wasn't the same as loving.

_ Ditto. _

She can't believe she really said that and can't help but grimace at the memory.

Her kidnapper wrongly assumes the pain is from the hit. ‘You don’t like that, huh?’

_ No she most certainly didn’t _ .

*** *** ***

Maggie calls McConnell.

As expected, her former colleagues is still very much an ass. ‘Bored of Gotham already? Not surprised.’

‘I need your help.’

‘Yeah?’ He chuckles. ‘Sorry, but I’m not going anywhere near the madhouse.’

‘It’s not nothing to do with Gotham, I...I didn’t even go,’ she stops as she feels herself deviating. ‘But that’s besides the point. Are you still investigating the Adams murders?’

‘I am.’

‘Good because Kayla Adams has gone missing.’

‘What?’

‘As has her foster carer. Both abducted.’

‘And you know this--.’

‘Surveillance cameras show them being taken. Three masked men, a black van, no license plate and no further leads,’ Maggie says. ‘The foster carer works for the government so the feds will be taking over this case and I’m currently working with them. So if you could get all the files in order then I can drop by and pick them up.’

‘So it’s either you or some generic men in suits, right?’

‘I’d like to think of it more as two lives being in danger so every second counts.’

‘Of course, of course. I’ll get them ready.’

‘Thank you.’ Alex’s bike was still parked at the DEO so she was going to take that and ride over. ‘Do you have any leads about who killed her parents?’

‘No. They were good at covering their tracks,’ he replies. ‘You think it could be the same people who took her?’

‘Maybe, I don’t know.’ And she hopes to god that it isn’t, so Kayla and Alex don’t suffer a similar fate - those sons of bitches were ruthless and they were both vulnerable right now. ‘Is there anything, anything at all, that jumps out? Just...anything?’ She’s desperate and she knows she sounds it.

‘Well, I wouldn’t say that this was major but did you know Kayla was adopted?’

*** *** ***

Another hit.

Another memory

This one so painful she starts crying.

_ ‘I want you.’ _

_ ‘Yeah, I know babe. But I want kids.’ _

And it’s hard to believe that memory has escaped her because everything about it, from the stack of cookbooks on the kitchen island to the heartbreak etched all over Maggie’s face, is so damn picture perfect in her mind.

She doesn’t just remember her cold delivery.

She also remembers her reluctance in saying those words, the words she was forced to say.

_ ‘We can’t be together.’ _

She hated herself then and she really fucking hates herself now.

She’s done a lot of dumb things in her life but nothing has ever came close to letting go of the best thing that’s ever happened to her. Hell, she’d jumped off goddamn skyscrapers without a guarantee that Kara would catch her but that still wasn’t as stupid - at least if she’d hit the ground, death would’ve been quick and the pain only momentary...the pain from the break-up was intense, a constant and prolonged ache, one that had created a chasm in her chest that only grew deeper with the passing days.

She hadn’t just lost a piece of herself.

She’d lost the  _ best piece _ of herself.

‘Wakey wakey,’ the goon slaps her face. ‘Earth to whatever your name is. Actually,’ he pauses and turns to the other guy who’d remained silent the entire time. ‘Did she come with a wallet or some form of ID? I’d love to know this bitch’s name and I get the impression she won’t be forthcoming if I asked her.’

Her pulse quickens. If he finds her work ID then she was in shit, deep shit, if she wasn’t already. Granted, it was fake but it still pinned her as a fed and, if he didn’t already know that, she had her doubts that it would go down well.

Luck’s on her side.

No ID, just a credit card.

‘ _ Alexandra Danvers _ , there we go.’

Her name brings up no relevant hits on  _ Google _ as it did with most databases since she’d become Director. Unless they had access to some top clearance government system, they couldn’t trace her.

He tosses the card to the ground along with a bunch of old receipts, and pockets the cash as he rifles through her wallet. ‘And who might this be?’

She doesn’t know what he’s talking about until he shows her the tattered snap.

Their third date.

They’d went to the mall and, like teenagers, had ran over to the photo booth the second they saw it. Maggie’s lips had never left Alex’s face for all four of the photos.

‘Tell you what,’ the guy smiles. ‘I’ll give you some time to think things through.’ He places the photo by her feet. ‘So you can think about whether or not you want to see this woman ever again.’

*** *** ***

‘Maria never said.’

McConnell shrugs. ‘Well she was. Adopted as a newborn.’

‘Do we know who the biological parents are?’ Maggie asks.

A shake of the head. ‘No. They abandoned her, left her in Vincent’s Park.’

_ Vincent’s Park _ . That sounded familiar. ‘Was that at Christmas?’

‘You remember the headlines?’

She does. ‘A baby found in a basket by the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve? C’mon, that story wrote itself. It’d made national headlines, not just local ‘That was Kayla?’

‘It was indeed.’

And now Maggie can’t help but wonder if there’s some connection.

*** *** ***

They give her a while to think about it.

It’s hard to work out just how long but she’d estimate it was at least a couple of hours.

A couple of hours she spends tugging at her restraints, even angling herself to try and bite through the plastic but, alas, it is all to no avail.

‘I’m going to ask you again,’ he says as he returns. ‘Who is Kayla’s case worker?’

She’s given this some thought and she’s got an answer that should satisfy him. But first… ‘Let me see Kayla. I need to know she’s okay and then I’ll give you your answer.’

‘That’s fair.’ He brings out his phone, showing her a picture of the little girl sat in front of a TV. ‘Taken just a few minutes ago because, like I said, she’s safe. We’re not going to hurt her. Now,’ he puts the phone back into his pocket. ‘You tell me what I want to know.’

Alex glances down at the photo by her feet, at Maggie. ‘John Jones. Kayla’s social worker is called John Jones.’ She’d thought about giving Kara’s name but her blossoming journalism career made that answer risky.

‘See? That wasn’t too difficult,’ her captor grins. ‘Now arrange a meeting with him.’

_ Shit _ . ‘I...I don’t know his number.’ Even with an intact memory, she was terrible with remembering digits.  _ Except _ … ‘But I know his secretary's number.’ After all, there was one number she’d never forget…

*** *** ***

She’s a cop, she knows how this goes.

The longer a person is missing, the shorter their chances of survival typically becomes.

It’s been three hours since Alex and Kayla were abducted in broad daylight and they have nothing, absolutely nothing. Agents were still working on tracing the van but, it appears, it’d evaded so many cameras that it’d more or less disappeared. And there was no leads from the NCPD investigation either.

All Maggie could do was sit on the steps that led to the balcony and hope that Kara and J’onn, who were out circling the city, could spot something.

‘Who is your friend?’

Maggie looks down at the dog she was clutching. ‘Bella. She belongs to Kayla.’

Brainy gestures to the step. ‘Do you mind if I join you?’

‘Go ahead.’

He sits down and his arm hovers awkwardly for a few moments before he puts it around her shoulder

‘A couple of years ago Alex got abducted,’ she says. ‘We got lucky there because Rick, the guy who took her, he wanted something in return so he made himself available. These people, well...if they want to hurt them then they have no reason to reach out, do they?’

‘J’onn and Kara are doing their best to find her.’

‘Sometimes even your best isn’t good enough,’ she says, soberly. ‘I...I’m sorry about earlier, by the way. I was rude to you, I apologise.’

‘No need. You miss your friend, I understand that.’

She nods. ‘I do.’

‘And Alex. You miss her too?’

‘So much.’

‘She is a great person. One of the very best on this planet.’

_ On this planet _ . ‘Are you--.’

‘I am a Coluan,’ he states. ‘I was with the Legion but I moved to Earth when Winn left.’

‘Ah.’ That makes sense. ‘You liking it here on Earth?’

‘It is...interesting.’

She snorts. ‘Yeah  _ interesting  _  is a good way of putting it.’ Her phone starts ringing and she pounces on it. A private caller. Usually she ignores but, given the circumstances, she answers. ‘Sawyer.’

‘Hi Maggie?’

_ Alex _ . ‘Hey, I--.’

‘Hi, this is Alex Danvers, Kayla Adams’ foster carer. I’m calling to arrange a meeting with John?’

_ What? _

‘Something has came up in regards to Kayla, it’s important.’

_ Oh _ . Maggie, kinda, gets it now and plays along, choosing each word carefully, figuring this conversation was being listened to. ‘Sure, that can be arranged. When would you like to meet him?’

‘As soon as possible.’

‘Well, you’re in luck, he’s free now. Where would you like to meet?’

‘At 1168 Cadiz Street.’

The industrial district by the waterfront. ‘John will be there as quickly as he can,’ she replies. ‘Is...is everything okay?’

‘Yeah, yeah but it just...it can’t wait.’

‘Alright, I’ll send him over there now. Thank you for calling.’

‘Thank you, I…’

_ Love you _ . Maybe she’s delusional, imagining what she wants to hear but that was what it sounded like Alex was on the cusp of saying.

‘... I appreciate your help,’ she says instead.

‘Always.’ When it comes to Alex, it’s always  _ always _ .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Always <3
> 
> Lemme know what you thought down below :)


	8. Chapter 8

Jones and Sawyer’s first case.

Except  _ Jones  _ was not allowing it.

‘You’re not coming.’

That's what he thinks. ‘You really think I’m going to stay away? Alex is in danger, so is Kayla.’ And she’d be damned if she was going to sit in the DEO and hear things play out over comms.

‘Alex knows you’re more than capable of holding your own; there has to be a reason why she chose me, and not you.’

‘What about Kara?’

‘Kara’s career has made her too much of a public figure these days, it’d be too risky to use her. Whereas  _ John Jones  _ is a common name, even  _ Googling  _ it wouldn’t raise any suspicion,’ he says. ‘This is likely dangerous, and the last thing Alex would ever want would be to put you in any danger.’

‘I just...I can’t sit back and do nothing, J’onn. If something happens and I’m not there, I…’ She’s unable to bring herself to finish it, the thought too horrible to entertain any longer than she had to. ‘I’m coming.’

It’s at that moment that J’onn knows he can’t win, that she’s every bit as stubborn as Alex is - that was one of the reasons why they’d always clicked so well, they were just as bad as each other. ‘Okay,’ he nods. ‘Okay, let’s think this through. What sort of building does she want to meet at?’

‘A disused office block,’ Brainy informs, bringing up blueprints on the screen. ‘Three floors. Last occupied over a year ago.’

‘Disused,’ J’onn muses. ‘So quiet. No witnesses. Perfect for an ambush.’

‘Ambushing who?’ Maggie asks. ‘For whatever reason, it’s Kayla’s case worker they’re after and think they’re going to meet. If I was them then I wouldn’t be expecting it to be that difficult to overpower one person, especially if there’s three of them.’

Kara nods. ‘Maggie’s right. If this is about Kayla, they likely don’t know about Alex. They won’t be expecting too much of a fight.’

J’onn mulls it over. ‘I drive there, park nearby. Maggie sits in the car. If you’re my secretary then that won’t look out of place. Kara’s in the vicinity in case things go south.’

It’s a compromise, and one she can work with. ‘That works.’

*** *** ***

It’s been a good half hour since the call.

Things still aren’t any clearer, her captors leaving her be after she gave them a name.

She tries her restraints once more, tugging at them with her teeth, managing to gnaw a little at the thick plastic of the zip ties.

Then they catch her. ‘What do you think you’re doing?’

Looking up, she braces herself for another attack. She’s met with the man’s face instead.  _ Shit.  _ Seeing faces usually meant one thing - they were going to kill her.

_ If Maggie turns up, they might kill her too.  _

The thought churns her stomach more than the thought of her own demise. ‘If you’re going to do it, do it. Get it over with.’

The man crouches in front of her. ‘Do what?’

‘Kill me,’ she says. ‘I’ve seen your face now.’

He shakes his head. ‘I’m not killing you, my issue is not with you. I just needed you for information. Like I said, once this is all over, you’ll be free to go.’

Alex’s eyes narrow. ‘Who is your issue with?’

‘The government,’ he replies. ‘That sweet little kid you fostered? They took her.’

‘Because her parents were killed,’ Alex says. ‘And you...you killed them, didn’t you?’

‘They weren’t her parents.’

‘What?’ Now she was even more lost and that, well, that wasn’t a denial either. ‘And even if they weren’t, that doesn’t make murdering them okay.’

‘They were…’ her captor’s green eyes grow remorseful. ‘...an unfortunate casualty. It wasn’t our intention to hurt them but they....they pulled on us, what were we supposed to do? It was self-defence.’

‘Self-defence?’ Alex scoffs. ‘You murdered them in their own home.’

‘We were trying to take back what was ours.’

‘They took Kayla?’

‘No, they didn’t, I know that now, I…’ he sighs, rubbing tired looking eyes. ‘We didn’t know they adopted her.’

_ Oh _ . ‘Is she your daughter?’

‘Not any of ours personally but she’s one of us.’

_ One of us _ . ‘Alien?’

The man nods. ‘The government swooped in on her parents shortly after she was born, took them whilst they used her for some  _ feel good _ publicity stunt. Do you remember the headlines about the kid found in the park, under the tree on Christmas Eve?’

Now that he said it, she did have some faint recollection of such a tale, though the specifics were still relatively foggy. ‘My memory’s not the greatest but that does sound a little familiar.’

‘Well, it was Kayla and it was all staged. They took her parents in without any explanation, though I’m sure I can hazard a guess as to why, and they put her in the care system so they could keep tabs on her,’ he explains. ‘We have no clue where Jackson and Brittany, her parents, are but we found out about Kayla and we knew we had to do something.’

The DEO never had the greatest reputation among the alien community but this wasn’t their doing. Kayla was five, putting it under J’onn’s directorship and there was no way he would ever authorise such a move. Unless… ‘What were Jackson and Brittany like?’

‘They were good people.  _ Are _ ,’ he corrects himself, ‘They’re still out there, somewhere, I...I hope.’

Alex wonders whether it’d be a good idea to come clean about her identity, to offer help and assurances that she’d help to find them. She ultimately decides against it - she hadn’t been there, she could only take his word that it was  _ self-defence _ .

_ Please _ , she silently prays.  _ Please stay the fuck away from this, Maggie _ .

*** *** ***

J’onn pulls up and kills the engine.

The building is in sight and looks borderline cliche with boarded up windows and graffitied walls. ‘Doesn’t look sketchy at all,’ Maggie remarks.

‘And that’s why you’re staying put.’

She arches a brow. ‘I thought you were my partner, not my boss?’

‘I am your partner,’ he says.

‘Surely only a boss has the authority to tell me stay?’

He rests a hand on the steering wheel as he turns to her. ‘Who do you think is primarily funding  _ Jones and Sawyer Investigations _ ?’

‘You?’

He shakes his head. ‘No. Try again.’

‘Well, you said business was good so...that covers costs, I guess.’

Another shake of the head. ‘Business is good and it enables me to cover all costs and expand but it’s not what made this whole enterprise possible,’ he explains. ‘No, who made it possible was a certain Director Danvers.’

‘Alex?’

J’onn smiles. ‘The DEO and I have a working relationship. As I was planning on explaining later, when you actually got started, we have full and unlimited access to any agency resources we need. It’s helped a lot the past few months. Alex may have not diverted any funds our way per se but what she has given us, out of the kindness of her heart, has been invaluable, and made it all possible.’

Now things made sense, and why Alex had told J’onn that she was a free agent. ‘Did she ask you to take me on?’

‘No,’ he replies. ‘She suggested you, said you were a good fit and you were, so I jumped at the opportunity to have someone like you on my team,’ he says. ‘Alex is a partner in this too and she asked for me, not you. That’s two against one. You’re staying in the car.’

Maggie huffs. ‘Fine.’

*** *** ***

Times passes slowly.

Then finally, ‘Someone’s here,’ one of the other men says.

The one that’s done all the talking nods. ‘Anyone else?’

‘No, just him.’

Alex feels some weight lift off her chest. A Martian stood a better chance against bullets than a mere mortal like Maggie ever would.

‘Stay here,’ her captor tells her, as if she’s going anywhere whilst tied to that chair.

‘John thinks he’s seeing me,’ she pipes up.

‘He’s not seeing you though,’ the man cocks his head. ‘You see what’s about to happen here, don’t you?’

You’d have to be an idiot not to. ‘Yes. And I think it’s a whole lot easier to ambush someone if they’re engaged in a conversation with the person they think they’re meeting.’

He gives it a second of thought before pulling a penknife out of his pocket. ‘I don’t need to tell you the consequences if you mess this up.’

*** *** ***

Maggie sits and watches the seconds tick by on her wrist.

She gives it five minutes.

Then she makes a move.

*** *** ***

She’s careful.

As she approaches the door of the building to let J’onn in, she rehearses the greeting in her head, making sure it’s enough to not raise suspicion. ‘Thank you for coming to see me at such short notice.’

The Martian, too, is putting on the necessary performance. ‘This is a peculiar place to ask to meet. Where is Kayla?’

‘She’s here,’ Alex answers. She doesn’t know that for definite but she’s assuming so, especially given the photograph she was shown of the kid. ‘She’s safe but, uh...it’s you I wanted to see.’ It’s then she communicates with him. Three blinks, three guys.

He gets the message. ‘Okay.’

Alex beckons for him to follow, leading him through to the ambush point.

J’onn’s greeted by a gun. ‘Mr Jones, it’s nice to meet you.’

*** *** ***

She’d snuck a photo of the building’s blueprints on her phone.

J’onn had went through the main door; she was planning on going through the one at the back that led to the car park - the car park in which the black van sat.

They were definitely here.

After Alex’s call, they’d moved pretty quickly but Maggie had still managed to help herself to a piece of tech at the DEO that’d jimmy the lock if need be.

It didn’t need be.

The door was unlocked.

*** *** ***

A confrontation ensues.

The story of what happened to Kayla’s parents becomes clearer and clearer.

Alex believes every word, feeling ashamed because she knows those horrible prejudices exist within the upper echelons of the government, the people that she reports back to. 

How fucked up the world is...yeah, that’s another memory.

‘You took a little girl away from her parents.’

‘I did not.’ J’onn’s palms were raised, but they weren’t shaking. ‘Hurting me won’t accomplish anything, I’m a case worker. I’m not sure what you’re talking about but it’s certainly nothing that I’ve done.’

‘It’ll send a message,’ Greeneyes countered.

‘No,’ J’onn shakes his head. ‘It won’t. You know those people are tonedeaf. If anything, it’ll further validate their reasons to do what they did. So please,’ he says, calmly. ‘Put down the gun. And let’s talk about this.’

Sensing it’s about to kick off any second now, Alex inches closer towards the Glock, to be in a better position to disarm the guy once he realizes J’onn’s bulletpr--.

Greeneyes spins and fires off two bullets.

A figure that Alex hadn’t even noticed until just now hits the floor.

A figure that Alex recognises.

_Maggie._  

Now it kicks off.

J’onn charges at Greeneyes.

Kara comes bursting in.

Alex drives a knee into the gut of one of the other guys, throws a couple of fists too, before finally incapacitating the presumed alien with a chokehold. ‘Find Kayla,’ she instructs her sister before running over to Maggie who’s…

...laying lifeless, two bullet holes in her leather jacket -  _ aka  _ Alex’s worst nightmare, the one thing she’d wanted to avoid.

Of course Maggie had come. Maggie was selfless, she always put others before herself. That was just who she was, who she’d always be.

Alex admired that.

Alex hated that too, as she drops to her knees to tend to the fallen Detective. ‘Hey,’ her voice is barely a whisper. ‘H-Hey, you with me?’

A groan as Alex rolls her over.  _ She was _ .

‘Good. Now stay with me.’

‘Al…’ Breathing laboured, Maggie can’t even say a two syllable name,

‘I’m here, I’m here.’ Her hands are shaky as they move to assess the damage, and she’s bracing herself for the worst, knowing full well both those 9mm bullets hit their target. ‘Stay with me, stay--.’ Then she sees it, the black poking out from underneath the white shirt, accompanied by the distinct lack of blood.

Kevlar. 

Maggie was wearing Kevlar.

And the breakdown that Alex had been on the verge of having, turns out to be one of relief. The words that escape her lips slip out but she’s not ashamed of them. ‘I love you.’ Why should she be ashamed? It’s the truth, and she’s long tired of repressing those feelings, feelings that she’d been pushing aside for months,  _ years _ even, as she tried to pretend that she was happy, tried her goddamn hardest to pretend that she hadn’t made the biggest mistake in the world. She remembers that feeling of regret now, that awful feeling of  _ I’ve ruined my fucking life _ .

She also remembers the nights she cried herself to sleep; the nights her finger hovered over the  _ call _ button; the nights she’d find herself heading over to 13 Flower Street before she’d stop and turn back, because she’d lost the right to turn up at Maggie’s door.

She’d thought that was it; resigned herself to that being  _ it _ .

_ It _ .

A lifetime of  _ okay _ when she could’ve had  _ magic _ .

Fate had other plans.

‘You...you too,’ Maggie manages, her knuckles white as she grips onto Alex’s arm. ‘F-Forever.’

*** *** ***

Pain.

She wakes up in physical agony, pain shooting through her right side.

It’s a nice difference.

It’s the first time in almost two years in which the pain she wakes up to is only physical.

It’s the first time in almost two years too that Alex Danvers is holding her hand.

‘Hey you,’ Alex smiles. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘Awful,’ Maggie replies. ‘Pretty sure the bullet would have hurt less.’

‘Bullet _ s _ .’ Alex gives that hand a little squeeze. ‘Count yourself lucky that it’s just three cracked ribs. Based on their trajectory, those babies would’ve both went right through your lung.’

_ Lucky _ . That she is, for reasons other than her wise decision to wear Kevlar. ‘My jacket’s ruined, isn’t it?’

The question is met with a laugh. ‘Really?’

‘What?’

‘You get shot and you ask about your jacket?’

‘It’s a nice jacket,’ she counters. ‘Expensive too, I just bought it a few weeks ago and, somehow, I don’t think their refunds policy will cover bulletholes.’

Another laugh. ‘Hey, you never know, It’s worth a shot.’

‘Pun intended?’

Alex nods. ‘Duh. Lame jokes are kinda my brand, you know that.’

That they were. As was thinking on her feet. ‘Saying J’onn was Kayla’s case worker was really smart.’

‘You guys did the hard work,’ she shrugs. ‘Well J’onn did. You decided to sneak up on an aliens that are noted for their perception.’

‘Lucky me,’ Maggie mutters. She needed more answers than that though.‘Who were those people? Why did they want Kayla and is she--.’

‘She’s totally fine,’ Alex reassures. ‘She’s currently hanging out with  _ Supergirl _ , and she’s never been happier.’

‘Kayla or Kara?’

Alex laughs. ‘Both, probably. But yeah, she’s fine and is, actually, going to be reunited with her parents. Her birth parents.’

_ Really needed answers _ . ‘I thought they abandoned her?’

‘They didn’t,’ Alex says. ‘Kayla’s an alien too.’

_ Oh _ .

‘And her parents fell victim to some of the some anti-alien practices that our beloved government still had in place back then - the government, not the DEO,’ she stresses before elaborating. ‘They were young, expecting a baby and struggling financially. They made a mistake, petty crime, to try and get by and the government used them--.’

‘To make an example of,’ Maggie finishes. She’d heard similar stories from the regulars at the alien bar over the years, about such power moves by the government to try and keep the ever growing alien population in line. It was one of the reasons why she was so distrustful of the DEO at first - meeting Alex, and seeing what she did had changed her mind. ‘And lemme guess...they staged that  _ baby found on Christmas Eve  _ story?’

‘Yep,' Alex affirms. 'But I located her parents, they’re being released and they’re going to get their daughter back.’

Nobody deserved a happy ending more than that sweet girl. ‘I’m gonna miss that kid.’

‘Me too. Minus the whole abduction, I was actually enjoying motherhood.’

So was Maggie. Maybe now was a good time to talk about--.

‘ _ Jones and Sawyer _ though,’ Alex says. ‘Today was the start of something special.’

They didn’t really do anything, but Maggie appreciates the possible segue. ‘J’onn told me you were responsible for that job offer.’

Alex shrugs. ‘I just had a hunch it’d be something you’d be interested in.’

‘Which, I believe, makes us partners now too.’

‘Correct.’

Now Maggie goes for it, not wanting to wait a second longer. ‘Just partners?’

And Alex gets what she really means, losing a little bit of her earlier bravado, becoming shy, looking away, down at the hand she’s still holding. ‘I...I think that’s up to you, I--.’

Of course there has to be an interruption - Brainy. ‘Detective Sawyer, I--.’

‘Do you ever knock?’ Alex asks.

‘I do. I knock roughly 60.362 percent--.’

Alex also doesn’t seem a fan of his numbers. ‘Is it important?’ 

‘Yes, I just wanted to check and see how Detective Sawyer is doing.’

_ Aw _ . Maybe he was like Winn after all - another annoying, but well-meaning, little brother. ‘That’s very sweet of you. I am. Just very sore.’

He nods. ‘Glad to hear it. I will leave now as I fear that I am interrupting.’ And, just like that, he’s gone.

Maggie lets out a small laugh. ‘You know, I kinda like that guy.’

‘I do too but he can just be a little...infuriating.’

‘Yeah, I can tell,’ she says. ‘He’s gone now so continue, please.’

‘I…’ Alex runs her thumb over the back of Maggie’s hand. ‘I think I told you everything back there.’

If they were going to give things another shot, then things had to be done differently this time. ‘Say it again. Communication is important.’

‘You’re right, it is,’ Alex nods, taking a second before meeting Maggie’s eyes. ‘I made a mistake. You’re what makes me happy, you’re what  _ I need  _ to be happy...it took losing you to realize that. I...I love you. So, so much.’

Maggie could feel her eyes starting to sting a little. ‘And what about kids?’  _ Love _ had never been the issue.

‘Not a dealbreaker, not anymore.’

‘But you’d be open to them?’

‘I…’ Alex arches a brow. ‘You want them?’

‘If I reach a point in my life where things feel right then yeah, absolutely.’ And she knew that, with Alex, that was a matter of  _ when _ , not  _ if _ . ‘If that’s okay with you?’

A tear rolled down Alex’s cheek. ‘Yeah.’

Maggie gently pokes Alex’s cheek with her index finger. ‘One condition though.’ 

‘Anything?’

She frowns. ‘ _ Anything _ ? That’s dangerous territory.’ She says it lightheartedly.

Alex replies seriously. ‘Not for you, it isn’t.’

_ I love you _ , Maggie thinks.  _ I love you so goddamn much _ . ‘I want us to date again.’ 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> see? told you they were endgame.
> 
> one more chapter coming next week :)


	9. Chapter 9

The first couple days feel a little off.

Alex acts like she’s made of porcelain.

At first it seems innocent enough, as if she’s just being extra careful, mindful of fractured ribs. Alex is happy to kiss, happy to hold but, as it quickly dawns on Maggie, only if she’s prompted. There’s no touches or stolen kisses, those sort of little things that Maggie absolutely adores but she finally catches on, figures out the reason why.

After all that’s happened between them, Alex needs explicit permission.

And Maggie is more than happy to give it. ‘You can touch me,’ she says three days into their rekindled romance. They’re back to their old routine of watching TV on the couch before bed but, now, Alex sits at the opposite end of the couch. Granted, cuddling is out of the equation when Maggie’s ribs are still so tender but still...there’s keeping your distance and then there’s doing what Alex is doing, sitting so far away and keeping all limbs to herself.

Alex looks shy, as Maggie was right and those words were needed. ‘I just...I wanted to make sure you were ready, you know?’

 _Ready_. Maggie has been ready for years, but she appreciates the consideration, the sweetness and the respect. A dull ache radiates throughout her chest as she shifts, repositioning herself so her head rests in her girlfriend’s lap.

Concern takes over Alex’s features. ‘Are you sure that’s comfortable?’

It wasn’t but, right now, merely existing wasn’t comfortable with her injury. ‘It is,’ she reaches out to stroke Alex’s cheek. ‘I love you, Alex. And I’m ready to share everything with you.’

Permission given, Alex runs fingers through Maggie’s hair. ‘I’ve missed this so much.’ 

The feeling was mutual, and the emotion stoked by such intimacy is overwhelming. Tears sting Maggie’s eyes. ‘Me too.’ Domesticity was something she adored and, as weird as it may sound, she couldn’t wait to go grocery shopping with her love, or wash the dishes or, hell, simply make the bed together every morning. Mundane tasks became special when they were done with Alex.

Alex’s eyes twinkle. ‘Things have, uh, well they’ve been starting to come back to me. I think the talks with J’onn have been helping.’ The past few days, she’d been sitting down with the Martian to talk about her memories, the two of them deeming that, given the nature of her life and the possible complications stemming from the mindwipe months ago, that it might be beneficial to talk things through with him.

‘That’s good news.’

‘It is,’ Alex agrees. ‘It’s...slow, and J’onn expects it to continue that way, that’ll take a little longer to, as he says, _unlock_ the older memories which is totally understandable but...but I remember parts of the accident.’

‘You do?’

A nod. ‘Some of it is still cloudy but I remember...like a wave of sound coming at me, and the ground shaking like an earthquake. It knocked me down and then...then there was a clang and I knew, just knew those shelving units were coming down on top of me and I thought--.’ Her voice catches. ‘I thought that was it.’

The words were difficult to hear.

Alex continues. ‘And all I could think about, in that moment...was you.’

 _Just as J’onn had said_. 

And, it seems, had said to Alex too. ‘J’onn believes that’s why I only remembered you at first and I think that’s the case, I do, but a part of me...well. A part of me thinks it’s not.’ She bites her bottom lip for a few seconds before coming out with it. ‘I think I remembered you because we’re soulmates which, years ago, I’d have laughed at that theory because I didn’t think they existed.’ She smiles. ‘Then I met you. My soulmate. My North Star. My--.’

‘ _Love_ ,’ Maggie finishes as a tear finally escapes. ‘I...I like that theory.’

Alex nods. ‘I do too but honestly? I think it’s less of a theory and more of a fact.’

Maggie couldn’t agree more.

*** *** ***

They have two years to make up for, there’s no point in taking it slow.

Once again, it’s Alex that proposes and she does it properly this time, down on one knee overlooking the waterfront on a beautiful night with an even more beautiful ring - a new ring to mark new beginnings. ‘Maggie Sawyer. Will you marry me?’

Of course, Maggie says yes.

*** *** ***  

New beginnings brought new friends.

Maggie heads to the bar after work, excited for the big reveal.

It’s Vasquez that notices first, the agent clocking it within seconds. ‘That is one big ass fucking rock.’

Maggie grins as she takes her seat at their booth.

‘That is not a unit of measurement that I am familiar with yet,’ Brainy leans forward to take a better look at the engagement ring that, today, was making its public debut. ‘Though it does look beautiful. My congratulations, again, to you and Alex.’

‘Speaking of,’ Vasquez arches a brow. ‘Where is the future Mrs Sawyer?’

‘ _Mrs Sawyer-Danvers_ ,’ Maggie corrects. Choosing one name didn’t feel right. They were a team, it's always been Sawyer and Danvers. ‘And Mrs Sawyer-Danvers will be joining us shortly. She’s currently with Kelly.’

‘Kelly?’ Vasquez pulls a face. ‘Seriously? Like...why? Is she wanting to fall asleep? Or is she using her medical experience to extract that big ol’ stick from that woman’s ass?’

Kara joins them just in time, carrying drinks. ‘Who are we gossiping about?’

‘Helly,’ Vasquez replies.

Maggie snorts at the nickname. 

‘Ugh,’ Kara sighs. ‘I can’t believe you’ve encouraged my sister to be friends with her.’

That Maggie has, and that Maggie has no regrets about doing so. ‘Look, she might be annoying but I don’t think she’s a bad person.’ She reaches for her bottle of beer. ‘Unless, of course, you know something that I don’t.’

‘No, no,’ Kara shakes her head. ‘You’re right, she isn’t a bad person.’

‘But?’ There was more to this story, always had been and Maggie wants to hear it. ‘C’mon, Kara. Something happened between you and her, didn’t it?’

Brainy raises a finger. ‘As I believe the kids would say, _what is the tea sis_?’

Vasquez laughs. ‘More like coffee actually.’

‘What?’

The agent offers an explanation. ‘One day Kara, as she often does, wasn’t looking where she was going and walked right into her, causing Helly’s likely expensive jacket to be completely ruined.’

‘I apologised,’ Kara stresses. ‘Profoundly. And offered to reimburse her for dry cleaning or even a new jacket but she was having none of it, and has held a grudge ever since.’

 _There it was_. ‘Did she know who you were at the time?’

Kara nods. ‘Yes. They’d been dating for over a month and game nights consequently became awkward and mean spirited. Take it from me, you do not want to play that woman at _Monopoly_ ,’ Kara shudders, she literally shudders. ‘Just...ruthless.’

Maggie can imagine. ‘Yeah, well, that said, I still don’t think she’s an inherently bad person. Alex doesn’t put up with that kind of shit so, as long as she’s good with her, then she’s good with me.’ She takes a swig of beer. ‘That said, though, I much prefer you guys’ company.’

‘Likewise,’ Vasquez agrees, clinking bottles. ‘So can I organize your bachelorette?’

‘Absolutely.’

‘Sweet!’

‘No strippers though,’ Maggie says. ‘I’m not interested in that, unless the stripper is my fiancee.’

‘That can be arranged.’

Kara frowns. ‘Would that really be appropriate?’

‘It’s just stripping,’ Vasquez shrugs. ‘And, you know, maybe a lapdance or whatever.’

‘With those two?’ Kara shakes her head. ‘That would quickly escalate, and I do not want to watch that.’

‘Watch what?’ 

Maggie turns at her fiancee’s voice. ’Look who’s here.’

Alex sits down beside her, kissing her cheek. ‘Hey.’

‘Everything go okay with you and Kelly?’

Alex nods. ‘Yeah, it was okay. A little awkward, obviously, but I think we’re going to be friends.’

‘Good, I’m glad.’ And Maggie was, she really was. Alex’s career was a stumbling block when it came to a social life, so it was good that Alex could retain a friend, instead of losing one. 

‘Anyways, watch what?’ Alex was insistent.

And Vasquez was Vasquez, completely honest. ‘Watch you giving your bride-to-be a lapdance.’

Kara rolls her eyes.

Alex is confused. ‘I...do not know what on earth you’ve been talking about but hey, you keep plying me with booze all night, and I can’t be held responsible for my actions.’ She turns to Maggie. ‘I mean, look at this one.’ She nuzzles Maggie’s nose.

‘ _Relationship goals_ ,’ Brainy remarks.

‘Dude,’ Vasquez laughs. ‘You sound like a teenage girl on Twitter.’

‘So I shouldn’t use these phrases?’

‘Not out loud,’ Vasquez says. ‘No, what you should be calling them is _nauseating_. Because they are.’

They were. Maggie couldn’t deny that. They were sickeningly in love.

They were also unbelievably happy, and on the verge of finally spending forever together.

*** *** ***

Every day together is great.

Saturdays, however, are always their favorite day of the week.

Hand in hand, they step into the elevator and hit the button for the 4th floor. The doors close, the two halves of a mirror coming together and Maggie can’t help but remark, ‘Look at those fiancees.’

Alex squeezes Maggie’s hand. ‘I can’t wait until they’re wives.’

‘They really are _that couple_ , huh?’

‘Yes,’ Alex grins. ‘And I love that they are.’

‘I love _them_.’

Alex nods. ‘I do too.’

The doors ping open and they step out, making their way to the end of the corridor. Maggie knocks three times on the door.

Squeals can be heard from the other side.

Beaming, Maggie turns to Alex.

Alex beams back.

And their smiles only grow bigger as Kayla opens the door and runs at them.

Her ribs are still not quite a hundred percent from the shooting but they’re better, and the excited hugs hurt a little less every week they visit. ‘Hey kiddo.’ 

Alex waits patiently for her hug, scooping Kayla up when she finally receives it. ‘It’s raining so, sadly, we can’t go to the playpark but we’re going to go to the mall instead. If that’s okay?’

‘Can we still get ice-cream?’ Kayla asks.

Maggie is offended that the question needs to be asked. ‘Duh. Of course we’re getting ice-cream.’

Ice-Cream Saturdays with Kayla were a weekly thing now, and Ice-Cream Saturdays were the best.

‘We’ll have her back by three,’ Alex smiles at the kid’s father.

*** *** ***

 _Build a Bear_ is their first stop.

They let Kayla have free reign as to what bear she wants to create, and the child settles on a heartwarming _Cop-Doctor_ hybrid in honour of Alex and Maggie who she proudly informs the shop assistant are _her best friends_.

Maggie very nearly tears up at that.

Then they head for ice-cream, the teddy safely in Alex’s purple backpack to avoid sticky chocolate-chip hands - Kayla’s not Alex’s, though Alex is almost as messy as the kid.

‘We’ve got something exciting to tell you,’ Maggie catches the runaway slither of vanilla ice-cream before it drips. ‘Don’t we, Alex?’

‘We do,’ Alex grins, holding out her left hand. ‘Do you know what this ring means?’

Kayla shakes her head. 

‘Well, it means--.’

Maggie can’t help herself. ‘We’re getting married.’ She can’t help herself because she loves saying that out loud, loves thinking about that exciting upcoming day that was, hell or highwater, going to happen this time around. 

‘In pretty dresses?’

‘Yes,’ Maggie answers. ‘Or maybe in pretty suits, I haven’t decided yet.’ She’s always been more comfortable in pants than dresses, and the thought of a rib crushing corset, especially after having three ribs recently broken, is far from appealing. Yet, on the other hand, it was her wedding, a special occasion, she could suffer through the discomfort for just one day. 

Last time they’d rushed so quickly into a wedding that, just mere weeks from the big day, neither of them had dresses, or suits, sorted. Now they were taking things slowly, taking time to plan things. And, in the midst of all the planning, had a very important question to ask Kayla.

‘We’re gonna have a wedding in a few months and, so, we were wondering if you’d like to be our flower girl?’ Maggie asks.

‘What’s that?’

Alex jumps in to explain. ‘The flower girl gets to walk with the bride and sprinkle flower petals down the aisle. It’s a super important job so that’s why we want you to do it.’

‘You also get to wear a pretty dress,’ Maggie says. ‘Or a pretty suit. Whatever you want.’

That has her interest. ‘Yeah!’

‘Yeah?’ Maggie checks.

The girl nods. ‘Can I take Max?’

Alex chuckles. ‘Who?’

Kayla tugs at the backpack, pointing at her new friend. Max!’

And then it clicks, and because Kayla is so smart, it feels intentional that the name of that bear, that hybrid of their two occupations, is called Max - _Max_ , an amalgamation of _Maggie_ and _Alex_.

These days, Maggie’s heart was no longer shattered.

No...it ran the constant risk of bursting.

*** *** *** 

The rain still pours.

They opt to sit inside to have their _Starbucks_ , and Maggie decides to make the most of it.

‘You better not spoil your appetite.’

Maggie nibbles at the carrot cake. ‘So good,’ she lets out a soft moan before nudging the slice over to her fiancee. ‘Here. It’s for both of us.’

The sweet tooth of Alex Danvers can never say no to cake, even despite the _Burger King_ for lunch and the ice-cream afterwards. ‘That is nice.’

‘Maybe they can cater our wedding.’

‘Oh.’ That seemingly gives Alex a thought, and she reaches for our phone.

‘Babe, that was a joke.’

‘No, no, not that,’ Alex pulls up the list on her phone, _that list_ , a digital version of the one she had printed out and stuck to the inside of the most adorable glittery purple _Bride-to-Be_ ringbinder that sat by her bed. ‘Venue? Check. Maid of Honor? Check. Flower girl? Check.’

‘The Legion planning a trip back to present Earth to bring back my best man? Check.’ They were already making good progress. The date was set for May, and was going to be a small affair, the guest list limited to just under thirty people. ‘Look at us go. Making wedding planning our bitch. And, dare I say it, it’s actually enjoyable this time. And,’ Maggie inches a little closer as, under the table, her knee presses into Alex’s thigh. ‘It’s also kinda sexy.’

‘Don’t,’ Alex whispers.

‘Or?’ She presses a little bit more.

‘Maggie…’

Laughing, she relents. They’re in public, she’s not that cruel. ‘Okay, okay. I’ll save it for our date tonight.’

*** *** ***

The date is at 112 Carlton Street, apartment 5A.

The apartment they moved into three weeks ago.

Maggie relaxes with a book on the couch as Alex cooks.

Yes. Alex is cooking.

In fact, Alex had cooked one night per week since they’d reunited and, whilst she’d been sticking to easy dishes, she’d been making a concerted effort to not get distracted, to not get frustrated if she makes a mistake and, consequently, the quality of the dishes have steadily been ticking up.

The quality doesn’t matter anyway.

It’s the thought that counts, and Alex always put a lot of thought into it what with buying flowers, lighting candles and choosing a very, _very_ nice bottle of wine every night she cooked.

Maggie loved it.

Maggie loved Alex so, so much.

‘That looks lovely,’ Maggie says as Alex sets plates down. They’re sitting on the floor, eating at the coffee table for no reason other than it feels so much more romantic, more intimate. ‘We’re totally gonna _Lady and the Tramp_ this, right?’

Alex laughs. ‘Who’s the lady, and who’s the tramp?’

Maggie shrugs. ‘I don’t mind. I always thought _Tramp_ was cuter anyway.’

‘So, by that logic, you’re _Tramp_ ,’ Alex grins as she leans in for a kiss. ‘It’s decided. Though I’m not sure that I’m a _La_ \--’ As if to confirm that lack of supposed grace, Alex’s elbow catches a wine glass, knocking it over, the rose spilling onto Maggie’s baby blue shirt.

Maggie manages to catch the glass before it falls onto the floorboards.

‘Shit! I’m so sorry, I--.’

‘No need to apologise,’ Maggie waves her off. ‘It’s just wine.’

‘ _Red_ wine. I’ve ruined your shirt.’

‘ _Your_ shirt,’ Maggie corrects.

It takes a second for Alex to realize. ‘It...is, you’re right. I didn’t even notice.’

Maggie chuckles. ‘Life with you also entails a free wardrobe, I can’t complain.’

‘I can because I can’t steal your clothes unless I want a whole new set of crop tops.’

‘You’re lucky I love the short jokes,’ Maggie says as she works at the buttons of the shirt.

‘I’m just lucky you love you.’

 _They were both lucky_. They kiss before Maggie pushes herself to her feet. ‘I’m going to quickly change, be back in a minute.’ It’s fall, a little too chilly to be sitting topless in the apartment so she pads through to the bedroom.

When they’d got back together, they both wanted a fresh start. They had some wonderful memories in the old apartment but they’d also had some horrid ones too, ones that they didn’t want daily reminders of. A new apartment was best, and they lucked out with a nice place not too far from the DEO. It was spacious, the neighbours were lovely and, get this....the bedroom had walls.

Okay, that was hardly revolutionary but it was for Alex, who was yet to adjust, once again talking about something in the living room and assuming that Maggie could make out what she was saying.

‘I can’t hear you,’ Maggie calls through, before laughing. _God knows what she’ll be like when we finally get a house_ , she thinks as she pulls a t-shirt over her head.

It’s another shirt that used to be Alex’s.

And, it's one that Alex remembers. ‘ _Hello Sunshine.'_

_\-- the end --_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for all the kind words and support for this fic. i've really enjoyed writing this and reading all your comments/theories/anger at the cliffhangers ;) y'all are the best.
> 
> p.s. another multi-chapter angsty fic will be coming later in the year :)
> 
> p.p.s SANVERS ARE ENDGAME

**Author's Note:**

> Lemme know what you thought :)


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